Plan B Forum

I'm here later than usual. My mother in law was taken to the ER at Stony Brook Hospital and I am here in the ER wiating room where they have 3 computers to use. Figured I would stop by planb
She has pnemonia and some fluid around the heart and maybe asthma. Wiating for some more test results. She just got out of the hospital a week ago for breathing problems. That was Brookhaven hospital. I would rather die than go there and I htink she might have if they took her there again.

They had kept her for almost a week and during that time they never got her up and walking around and she was barely walking when she got there. So they released her and she couldn't walk at all. They wanted to send her to rehab for another week or so, but we had someone come in to giver her rehab at home.

She's 85 with breathing problems and you always wonder if this is the last trip.

I'm saying my prayers.

Our thoughts are with you, her and your family mate

God Bless, old'r

Thanks
After talking to the docs, it's not as bad as we thought. She does have pnemonia but the fluid around the heart should go away on it's own. At least for now no sticking a big ass needle into her to drain it. They are talking about giving her an inhaler to take home and she on anti-biotics for the pnemonia. She'll bin in for a few days. We left after they got her into a room and she was sleeping comfortably (at least as far as I could see).

Woke up to four inches of snow this morning. My wife was going to go to work then go to the hospital, but she's worried about her father driving in this slop so she may take off and take him there. He's 85 (86?) and was not that good a driver when he was young, forget now. Backing up is his biggest problem and he gets lost. I won a GPS system here at work at the Christmas party that I may give him, but then maybe not. He is not technically savvy and I don't know if he would/could use it. Probably cause more problems with his driving than it would solve.

my sister in law can't help as she is going into the hospital in a couple of days to have a tumor removed (we don't know if it's cancer yet) and she doesn't want to risk catching anything, so much of this is all falling onto my wife. Thankfully her new job understands (she only started about a month ago).

I do have a little trouble with my FIL in not realizing the situation with my MIL. She was in the hospital a week or so ago and they never got her up and around. When she came home she was not even walking. She was barely walking when she went in and then laying on a bed for a bunch of days she lost what little muscle she had. The doc asks my FIL how she was at getting around and he tells him "pretty good before the recent hospital stay but she's having a harder time since." Thankfully my wife was there and told the doc hte real story. Then my wife said to her dad that he has to face reality and tell the doc what she does and doesn't/can't do. The doc can't make good judgments if he doesn't have as much of the facts as possible.

I've been telling anyone who would listen my MIL has to get up and walk around as much as possible. But my FIL babies her and as soon as she makes a sound like she is in a litttle pain, he stops.

Sucks getting old.

Sorry I missed this yesterday oldr...

Glad to hear the prognosis is good.

Sounds like your MIL could use some occasional trained in home help...(physical therapy, etc.)

It may be that your FIL isn't up to providing her with what she needs on his own...

Lord Jim wrote:Sorry I missed this yesterday oldr...

Glad to hear the prognosis is good.

Sounds like your MIL could use some occasional trained in home help...(physical therapy, etc.)

It may be that your FIL isn't up to providing her with what she needs on his own...

Nail, meet LJ's hammer.

We've been telling him that for years. My sons girlfriend had been filling the role (for 4-5 hours a day) for the past year or so, but she and the son moved to Texas this past weekend. We think he needs at least a full day aid and she needs a physical therapist daily for a while. When someone pushes her, she does the work. But if it's just the aid and my FIL, as soon as mom moans a little in pain, he shuts it down. When I'm there and I say "c'mon mom lets walk" she gets up and walks (with her walker) around the house for pretty much as long as I walk with her.

We also floated the suggestion about sellign the house and getting into an assisted living community. Finally he is open to the suggestion. Last month he was not reseptive to the idea at all.

He has the money for anything not covered so it's not like he can't afford it.

I hope she improves and is out quickly, oldr.

I just got back after spending much of the last three weeks with my Mom at Yale New Haven hospital. She unexpectedly became critically ill, and they managed to bring her back from the brink and get her strong enough so that she could have her aortic valve replaced last week (through a new less invasive procedure, and using a trial (not yet FDA approved) valve) -- all designed for high risk patients like her. She is doing fabulously, and just yesterday was finally sprung to rehab (a great place, 5 minutes from my sister and the kids), where she will work on getting stronger and learning her new baseline, which should be better than the baseline she was on just over the holidays.

It was quite the saga, and my sister and I are so grateful for the excellent medical care she received, from top to bottom and sideways. There was not one person who worked in the CICU who wasn't rooting for her and for us, and who made us all feel incredibly well cared-for. We are also exhausted. I'm back at work this week, finally, and trying to get my own feet back underneath me.

There are lots of long-term decisions to be made coming up, but for the short term, all is well and well-managed. Thank goodness.

Rest up Guin and glad everything turned out well.

Lovely news Guin,.

That's great Guin.

What he said.

Mom has taken a turn for the worse. I was called at work on thursday noon-ish and my wife was crying. I went to the hospital and they moved my MIL to ICU and basically started her on the "comfort" regime. Morphine and oxygen. I stayed at the hospital til 3am and my wife stayed the whole night and most of friday. Friday afternoon my MIL started getting a little better so hopes were up. Saturday they moved her out of ICU and cut back on the morphine. She is able to eat a little and they have an IV. Problem now is she is not getting rid of fluids. The chest area is starting to fill up. So we are back to the waiting game. The only "good" thing about all of this is I got to watch a saint take care of an angel. (more in by drunk-a-log)

On a side note.
I'm rushing to the hospital and about 3 miles from the place my steering starts to feel wierd. Then I go to make hte turn and I practically pull a muscle trying to turn right into the hospital. Power steering is out. I make it into a parking spot and pop the hood and check the fluid. I little low but not low enough to lose it totally. I put a little fluid in to get it on full and still no power steering. (yes I keep all the needed fluids in the car, oil, tranny, ps, antifreeze and washer fluid). I look and see there is no pelt to the AC (the only accessory I can see from the top). The PT has two belts (not counting the timing belt which also runs the water pump). One belt is for hte alternator and the other belt goes to the AC and PS pump. That belt is gone. Go into the hospital, get my daughter to follow me home and take me to the parts store to get anew belt then back to the hospital. Stay there a while and give support to my wife and be with my MIL. Then I take my daughters car home so I can work on my car.

Jack up the car, take off the wheel, take off the splash guard and find out it's the pully wheel on the belt tensioner. Back to the parts place and get the pully (at least I didn't have to buy the whole tensioner). Put it all back together, and clean up and go back to the hospital.

When it rains it pours.

Saturday night my wife and I are resting on the couch (I finally got her to come home and rest a bit as I am worried that she is going to get run down and sick from all this) and who walks in, my son and his GF. They drove 30hours striaght from texas to come see their grandma one last time. I called him an asshole as we were telling them to get airline prices and I'll pay for their tickets. But he insisted on getting back home. Gotta love the kid.

So now we wait. I'm back at work. My wife is going in for a bit as her boss said come and go as she needs to. So I think a little normal routine will benefit my wife as she is very "antsy" (for lask of a better word).

I don't knwo if I mentioned it before but all is falling on my wife as her father has the flu (recovering now but still weak) and her sister is still recovering from an operation. Thankfully my son came up, he is helping tremendiously.

Such is life (and death).

I don't know about the car stuff oldr but your first paragraph is excruciatingly familiar. God bless.

Really sorry to read this oldr the wait and see part of any serious illness is always so stressful on everyone xx

I repeat what RB said...

I've also been there...

My sympathies, too, oldr. Been there, sux.

Our sympathies too O-n-W. Those of you who read our blog will know this;

Mary, the mother in law recently went off to one of her “Veterans Olympics” events. It was being held in Bendigo, which is a good 6 ½ hours drive from Canberra, (9 ½ at the speeds Mary drives.) Four of them went down in Mary’s car, sharing the driving. Mary, despite being 80 years young this year, still throws discus, hammer and javelin at national level. Throws them further than I can in fact.

She normally comes back from these things with a couple of medals, or a new “Veteran’s record.”

This year she came back with a leg broken in two places. Apparently she fell out of the throwing circle, tripped over the lip while throwing the discuss, and ended up in Bendigo hospital. Not all in one go though.

Unfortunately it wasn't healing so well, so she's now had a plate and five screws put in it. Hen's taken a fortnight off work to assist her at home. Hen had 6 months "personal leave" (i.e. not holiday leave,) available to draw on.

Sorry to hear that gob. Best thoughts and wishes are with you all.
80yo and throwing that stuff around?????!!!!!?!??!?!
Whatever keeps her young.

I guess she also got a slipped discus?

Hope she gets better swiftly.

My Mom is back in the hospital, back in ICU. I shan't be around much I don't think -- we don't really know where this is all headed, but it is not very good.