Marriage, Procreation, & Related Topics

[oldr_n_wsr]

But we're still married, so WTF?

You must be doing something right.
Love is not about money.

I have subsequently bought her diamond rings, etc., but she still wears the engagement ring

Sentimental value. Sometimes the best things are from the heart and soul, not from the wallet.

Everyone else can form their own opinions, it only matters what you two have together and it sounds like you have "it".

I too would have loved to have given her the 2 carat dimond and platinum setting, but I was more concerned with how to buy a house and support a possible family than spend money on a piece of jewelry that gets shown off once and then just worn. Sorry, I'm cheap that way. although in better times I have splurged on jewelry for my wife, just that when you are young and at the bottom of your earnings, it just seemed and unecessary expense

[The Hen]

Editec was right, you can't get over yourself.

I remember what he said about you too Lo.

Do you really want to post like that?

[loCAtek]

1) The sentiment of wanting to do the very best for your child albeit spiritually should be encouraged.

2) When Editec commented on me, it was addressed appropriately.

3) When Editec was correct about other comments about me, they will also be addressed appropriately.

Editec


I think that would be a terrific idea, AW.

Why don't you start a board and invite all your chums to post there?

I wonder which of you pals will be the designated scapegoat for public ridicule on your board?

I'm guessing LoCAtek.

Want to know why?

Because she's been informing you about the ups and downs of her life for years, now

That trusting nature of hers makes her easiest target for that nonstop ad hominen nastiness that you and others need to dish out to make ya'll feel better about yourselves.

Now, some have chosen to continue to be trustworthy, and others have chosen to be 'foes'; hope they feel better.


PS - You know how to get a holda me, I've been trying to get a holda you.

[Jarlaxle]

Not to be argumentative, Jaraxle, but you are a liar.

There is no fucking way that you could have been named a godparent, and had your name noted on a BAPTISMAL CERTIFICATE (not a Birth Certificate) without your knowledge or consent. And you say this happened twice? Bullshit and bullshit squared.

That is what I was told. Was Bruce BSing me as a joke? Yeah, quite possibly. I never actually saw his daughter's BC, though I vaguely recall seeing a listing for it on someone else's.

[dgs49]

Checking back in...

The kid is home now, a lovely girl. Everyone is happy and healthy.

The question arises: who shall take care of the Kid when the POSSLQ goes back to work? POSSLQ's mom? Greg's sister? Greg's mother? Private child-care worker?

One name strangely does not come up. Greg has not worked for a couple months now (lost his job for calling a co-worker a "motherfucker" - is suing for wrongful termination).

Hmmm.

What is the legal obligation of a sperm donor?

[oldr_n_wsr]

That's something to be determined. What are they doing for money now? While a company is legally obliged to "hold" the mothers job (or a similar position) open until she can return to work, they do not (AFAIK) have to pay her during her pregenancy absence.

glad I gave both my kids the "preventive" reproduction speach (I think they actually listened for a change) and needed supplies

[loCAtek]

If he's on the birth certificate? Depends on which state, mostly it's just financial.

[thestoat]

My daughter was born out of wedlock. I never believed in marriage, thinking it just another thing cooked up by the state to control people. However, the law was so against us in so many unexpectedly odd ways (not helped by the fact my then girlfriend now wife is German) that we ended up being forced into marriage (it being the lesser of two evils).

What I found interesting was that we could then "unbastardize" our daughter by going through a legal ceremony to legitimise her.

No way I would ever baptise her though. I plan to ensure she gets a balanced view of religions and atheism and then let her make her own mind up.

Just my two penneth worth

[Sean]

No way I would ever baptise her though. I plan to ensure she gets a balanced view of religions and atheism and then let her make her own mind up.

Exactly the same line we're taking with our lad Stoat.

[Gob]

Stoat and Sean

Religion is Like a Penis

It’s fine if you have one.

It’s fine if you like it.

But just don’t whip it out in public and start waving it around.

But most of all, I don’t want a priest shoving it down my kids throats!

[dgs49]

O&W, the POSSLQ has a good job, and will draw full sick pay for a couple weeks, then switch to short term D, which is I think about 60% of her salary. She was fortunate to have the kid a bit prematurely, so she literally worked up until the day before the Baby was born. Greg is now drawing unemployment (I'm somewhat surprised), and makes a few bucks here & there doing odd jobs. They have two brand new vehicles and are paying on two mortgages - I have no idea how they are managing to do this.

Regarding children and the teaching of religion, I do not believe children are capable of processing uncertainty. If you say to a kid, well...some people believe this about "god" and "heaven" and "hell," and some people believe in reincarnation, and some people believe WYSIWYG - there ain't no "god," they will never believe anything, and will equally disrespect all views.

Maturation, educationally at least, requires the initial teaching of absolutes, followed by the teaching of opposing views, after which the kid might be able to make a rational, well-informed decision about what to believe or discard. This is why we don't teach fourth graders that Thomas Jefferson was a scum-sucking slaveholder who father bastard children with the kitchen maid. We wait until college to bring out those details and hope the kid doesn't grow up to be like editec.

Teaching nothing in particular inherently breeds disrespect for all views, regardless of how well reasoned or founded.

Just my opinion.

[thestoat]

Interesting opinions, dgs. I think children do understand that not everyone agrees on a topic, though of course it depends on the age. The problem I have is that My son goes to a typical British school where he is taught something I believe is false. I have no power to alter the teaching methods, but I cannot sit by and let it wash over me without doing something.

Kind of like sending your child to a school in the US where they teach the earth is 5,000 years old and really was created in 6 days by a god (I believe they exist, but it is a useful example even if they don't). You may be forced to accept this is taught to your child, but (assuming you don't believe it), would you simply say "well, my child can't process uncertainty so I'll let it go"?

[oldr_n_wsr]

Age brings "resonability". That is, it us stupid to think yo can reason with 2yo's as their world revolves around them and those around them. Thus the swat on the butt is a better method to teach them not to pull on the cats tail or not to touch the hot stove than trying to explain to them the reasons they shouldn't do those things. You can teach them habits and general respect, but trying to get through to them about religion (or lack there of) is beyond their scope at that age. Of course each age (or mental maturity as not all kids are the same) brings/needs new methods to any given philosophy you wish to present (or they wish to question).

[loCAtek]

Adeo in teneris consuescere multum est

Translation, Literally: "It is very important to be well trained in your youth"; more commonly known as: "Who learns young, forgets not when he is old."

I believe that also applies to philosophizing on ...whatever. It's best to think about it, rather than deliberately limit your thought.

[thestoat]

I agree, lo.

Oldr, I am pretty sure nobody is talking about reasoning with 2 year olds - I am certainly not.

[dgs49]

Stoat: I know of no such schools, though I'm sure there must be a few of them around. Certainly no state school is teaching the literal truth of the Bible. Catholic and most other religious schools teach Evolution and current geological thinking, just like the public schools.

I don't recall much that my son was taught that I disagreed with, although I was more than a little bit perturbed when, as a 6th grader, he received instruction on "safe" anal sex.

[thestoat]

dgs

I am glad to hear about the US schools - in the UK we occasionally get horror stories of Bible Belt schools in the US insisting on creationism, but maybe they are just horror stories with no truth in them. As mentioned though, the model serves as a useful example even if the schools don't exist. Do you stand by having your child taught stuff you simply don't believe to be true, or do you also provide your own point of view? I plan to ensure my children get a balanced view of religions and atheism and then let them make their own mind up.

[Crackpot]

There's slot of fuss about teaching creationism in schools along with evolution and the desire for "just a theory" to be emphasIzed. But very little creationism only.

[thestoat]

There's slot of fuss about teaching creationism in schools along with evolution and the desire for "just a theory" to be emphasIzed. But very little creationism only.

Isn't that why the Spaghetti Monster was created? So it got equal billing with Creationism as "just a theory"?

[Crackpot]

I was talking about the fact that some creationists want evolution to be taught as "just a theory".