Clown shoes for the clown show

[Scooter]

Who will be the first to take off their shoes?

When Joseph Stalin took the stage, applause wasn’t just standard. It meant your freedom.

As the crowd thundered with cheers, no one dared to break first. Not after two minutes. Not after four. Not after six. As Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn wrote in “The Gulag Archipelago,” “It was becoming insufferably silly even to those who adored Stalin.”

Finally, after 11 minutes, one man — the director of a paper factory — broke the spell. And with that one act of independence, he sealed his fate. The director was arrested that evening.

On his interrogation document, an important lesson was inked into the pages: “Don’t ever be the first to stop applauding!”

Now, Donald Trump’s men are learning the same lesson — the humiliating way. Although this time, the question is different: “Who will be the first to take off their shoes?”

Across Washington, D.C., a new fashion trend has taken hold of those in Trump’s circle: embarrassingly oversized clown shoes.

More specifically, a pair of $145 Florsheim oxfords. Trump is apparently obsessed with the shoes, and it’s getting weird. According to the Wall Street Journal, the president has taken to handing them out to Cabinet members, advisors and White House VIPs. He even makes it a game: guessing people’s shoe size, placing an order and then signing the box.

Forget policy and matters of government. At Cabinet meetings, Trump jumps in to ask, “Did you get the shoes?” As one female staffer noted, “All the boys have them.”

But this isn’t the type of gift horse you can safely look in the mouth. Another female White House staffer joked, “It’s hysterical because everybody’s afraid not to wear them.” Like Stalin, Trump is paying attention to see who stops clapping first.

Trump’s shoe test borders on humiliation ritual. They appear much too big on most of the recipients, and with their pants hemmed to match the president’s absurdly short length, it’s comical. One might assume that Trump purchases the incorrect sizes on purpose.

As Trump quipped to an (unnamed) politician who wears a size 7, “You know you can tell a lot about a man by his shoe size.”

So far, confirmed shoe victims include J.D. Vance, Marco Rubio, Pete Hegseth, Howard Lutnick, Sean Hannity and Lindsey Graham. There are surely more who are suffering in silence.

Trump’s clown shoe antics are somehow beyond “insufferably silly.” It is so blatantly on the nose that if this were a novel, I would be required to suspend my disbelief.

And this isn’t just about an ill-fitting shoe. The president’s strange side-quest perfectly captures the psychology of MAGA. In this circus we call a government, the clowns are the men surrounding Trump, and he is their idiotic ringmaster.

As he styles them to his liking, they are too afraid to disobey. If they take off the shoes, will he cast them out of his inner circle? Will he tarnish them on Truth Social? Will he send them to the gulag?

That last one isn’t a joke, nor is it an exaggeration. In an era of baseless political prosecutions, you are one wrong shoe away from facing an indictment.

As one cabinet secretary complained, he had to shelve his Louis Vuittons in favor of the president’s preferred style. What else has he had to shelve over the years to please the president? His morals? His values? His brain?

While we have all been visually assaulted by the clown shoes, we have also felt the consequences of Trump’s hold on the Republican Party.

Sen. Susan Collins has done pirouettes around her policy positions in order to please Trump. The Department of Justice has found itself on the other side of its own lawsuit in its quest to demand voter rolls and rig the midterms. And just recently, Sen. John Cornyn — who is facing an intense runoff election — has flipped on the filibuster to appease Trump on the SAVE America Act.

The list of spineless capitulations is practically endless. If MAGA men can’t stand up to Trump on the shoes they choose to wear, what can they stand up to the president on? The answer is easy: nothing.

While Trump’s circle can’t find the strength to disagree with the president, it’s worth noting that Weyco, the parent company of Trump’s beloved Florsheim, is currently suing the administration over tariffs.

Businesses may oppose Trump’s policies, the public may be worried for democracy, and protestors may be taking to the streets — but the audience won’t stop clapping. They have learned Solzhenitsyn’s lesson.

The Republican Party will follow Trump off a cliff — and given their footwear, they will likely trip over the edge.

[ex-khobar Andy]

When I first read the story about the shoes I didn't believe it - it must be photoshopped or AI and there is so much around these days I am really cautious. I spot many (IMO) AI fakes and always point out there is so much idiocy surrounding this president that there is no need to add fake stuff. In fact it is counter-productive.

And then I read about them in that commie Murdoch rag, the Wall Street Journal. Good enough for me.

https://www.wsj.com/style/fashion/trump ... t-448567ab?

[Big RR]

Saturday Night Live picked up on it as well, showing "Hegseth" in what he called the clown shoes.

[Burning Petard]

I have a pair of those Florsheim's, after more than 20 years they still look good and actually fit properly. I paid $49 for them. They have lived in my closet, mostly untouched since I retired. I rarely wear them because I rarely wear a suit and tie any more. Sometimes for a funeral, but then I prefer black toe-cap ankle boots.

I have always heard Trump's favorite golf club is a #9 Florsheim. (for kicking the ball into a better lie)

snailgate.

[BoSoxGal]

[MGMcAnick]

I have a pair of those Florsheim's, after more than 20 years they still look good and actually fit properly. I paid $49 for them.
snailgate.

My mother had serious foot problems due in part to trying to stuff her size 10 feet into smaller shoes. I don't know if it was a vanity thing, wanting to look more petit, or the inability to find size 10 women's shoes. At any rate, she was always insistent on me wearing good, properly fitting, shoes. I remember going to a Florsheim (only) store in downtown St Louis with her prior to my sophomore year in college to buy me a pair of 13A Florsheims. They cost $30. I know I wore them to my 1973 graduation. I don't remember when I abandoned them.

I still strive to wear properly fitting shoes, mostly New Balance 928 V3.

[Burning Petard]

I was never a participant in organized sports. I went into bicycle racing as a supporter of the racing events put on by my local adult recreational bike club. I learned that real bike shoes came only in european sizes I was recommended as a size 39-- from a 6-and-a-half 3E ! Then I leaned that the only thing used by serious racers was a Detto brand that took nailed-on cleats. Standard practice was to spray the shoes with water from your water bottle as you rode, and let the shoe dry shrink/stretch to fit. carefully examine the marks on the bottom of the shoe from your pedals and fix the cleats according the the wear on the bottom.

Since the 70's that has totally changed for biking. But I could never understand why men's dress shoes came in a bewildering variety of sizes length usually from 7 to 14 and width from A to EEE. bigger width and longer of shorter on special order. But Adidas and Nike, the dominant sport shoes, only sized for length, sometimes some models available also in 'wide'. Surely sports shoes need to fit better than dress shoes?! The store sales clerks just looked at me as if I was crazy.

Then I discovered New Balance. They are made in complete range of size, just like Florsheim dress shoes. My feet and lower legs are always swollen now and I wear New Balance 8EEEE for almost everything. I have four pair in three colors. I still follow my old army (peace time) training and never wear the same shoes two days in a row. They last alot longer that way.

snailgate.

[Burning Petard]

PS. I laughed my self silly when I was working a checkpoint on the fourth Race Across America. Lon Haldeman (first person to ride coast to coast in less than ten days!) came through wearing the Dettos with the Italian flag painted black and white Nike Swooshes painted on the sides of the shoes. That is real professionalism.

I have a still have pair of biking gloves that he autographed for me.