Partially correct, rubato. For roughly the first 40 years of my life I did not seek any form of relationship with members of the opposite sex, driven in part by some of the questionable and ultimately failed relationships I had seen several of my friends and family members go through; also because once I graduated from high school I threw myself into the various jobs and employments I held, almost all of which were on the second or overnight shift, as well as embracing cycling to the exclusion of almost all other pastimes or diversions — including he-ing and she-ing.rubato wrote:It is not fair to expect differently from someone who is 60-ish and has never been in a long-term relationship with a woman.
He has never had or, apparently, sought an adult male relationship with a woman. how would he know any better?
yrs,
rubato
Once I did realize that, for whatever reason, I had short-sightedly allowed a major stage of my interpersonal development to pass me by, I then ran into a different sort of problem. When you try to put yourself "into the market" but any and all of your knowledge of "the dating game" comes from the way the game was played in the 1960s, well.... I found that it's like bringing a VW 'Beetle' to the Indy 500 and expecting to be competitive. After enough times of doing this and feeling that one has made a complete fool of one's self, one eventually stops trying.
Now, as I approach retirement age, I am more or less resigned to the fact that any long-lasting, meaningful relationship with the opposite sex is, like my childhood fantasies of becoming a racing car driver, something that will never come to pass (although there is the one woman I did spend some time with and for whom I am still carrying a torch, almost ten years after our last face-to-face encounter, so I guess maybe there is still some small spark — one very last inch of me — that refuses to die) and that when it comes my time to shuffle off this mortal coil I will probably do so alone and with no one to miss or mourn me.

-"BB"-