Happy Birthday Mr President...

[Gob]

MIKHAIL Gorbachev's 80th birthday party in London's Royal Albert Hall had diamonds, furs, Hollywood stars, wrinkly rockers and enough Botox to fill the craters of the moon. Understated it was not.



At more than four hours of songs, speeches and awards, the star-studded charity gala wasn't undersized either. The Mikhail Gorbachev - The Man Who Changed The World gala at the Royal Albert Hall was hosted by Kevin Spacey and Sharon Stone.

The former Soviet leader personally chose Sir Tim Berners-Lee, the founder of the internet, as a ''man who changed the world''. He also honoured CNN founder Ted Turner and Kenyan engineer Evans Wadongo, as winners of the inaugural Gorbachev Awards.


The event featured performances by Dame Shirley Bassey, Katherine Jenkins, Bryan Ferry, Paul Anka, Melanie C, Valery Gergiev and the London Symphony Orchestra.

Arnold Schwarzenegger, the former governor of California, Lech Walesa, the former Polish president, and actresses Goldie Hawn and Milla Jovovich were among stars who made a red-carpet entrance to the event.

Israel's President Shimon Peres, who is 87, offered consolation: ''It's OK, Mikhail Sergeyevich,'' he said. ''The first 80 years are the hardest.''



Proceeds from the evening went to the Raisa Gorbachev Children's Institute for Transplantology in Russia. AGENCIES

[dales]

He lived to see RONALD REAGAN buried.

[Crackpot]

You're thinking of Khrushchev.

[dales]

No, I'm playing off of his remarks.

[Gob]

I miss Boris..

[The Hen]

Boris was a smooth Russian dancer. Shame the vodka he was drinking wasn't as smooth as he.