Living Life Lesbian

[oldr_n_wsr]

Another mystery solved.

[Scooter]

Here I always figured it was my sparkling personality.

Or, in the case of the mother of one of my girl friends (as opposed to "girlfriends") because I taught her how to re-sew on buttons that had come off a coat.

[oldr_n_wsr]

I taught her how to re-sew on buttons that had come off a coat.

A skill everyone should have, homosexual as well as heterosexual of both sexes.

[Gob]

Interestingly, last night on the "biggest loser" they had a cocktail party for the remaining four contestants, where they got to meet potential suitors, without wanting to go into too much details.)

One contestant, Margie, was introduced to ten potential female suitors, one she hit it off with quite nicely.

So good to see lesbian women being allowed to flirt and express desire for each other on prime time TV. (7.30 pm.)



If that doesn't help break down prejudice noting will.

(Unfortunately Margie really has the hots for her trainer!)

[MajGenl.Meade]

Yes but the outfit, my dear..... looks like she borrowed the collar from her dog to get those studly boards

I am however noting like crazy

Meade

[The Hen]

I reckon that in order to address the problem in helping her deal with habitual harassment, you should ensure you not inadvertently add your own harassment to her woes. However well-intentioned.

What I like most is- RMD1 refuses to label herself, she's never called herself a lesbian; if the topic comes up, she's just 'A girl who likes girls'

Perhaps if you are using these terms in front of her, you should stop?

She is very young.

She does not sound like she is as sexually experienced as you might imagine,

... and it certainly doesn't sound like she wants to be classified as a lesbian.

[loCAtek]

Yup, so far the household hasn't pinned any labels on her, as I've outlined;

Her initial experience with derogatory sexual terms was within the 'Rage Against the Machine' video. As [I'm feeling] her aunt, I don't feel the need to emphasize her labels, just yet; as I'm helping her seek her first summer job; in order to encourage civil productivity and Independence, 'eh, no?

[Gob]

Yup, so far the household hasn't pinned any labels on her, as I've outlined;

You have though;

Your help, hope, history on raising girls homo.


...any other words of advice, to the emerging lesbo?

We were all watching vids one weekend, starting with Swift Taylor (who had been bullied for being tall) and moving onto 'Rage Against the Machine', who showed a strong homo-bullying message in one of thier vids; and RMD1 was made a little upset.
'Why are they against people like me!?' she cried, 'This hurts!'

Her initial experience with derogatory sexual terms was within the 'Rage Against the Machine' video.

RATM are a band known for their left wing stances and activism. Which video?

[loCAtek]

I have here yes, but not in the household. Here, I had to use terms that described her sexuality, but at home the only thing I call her is her name.

I can't find the video, because I can't recall the title, but I can remember the story scene:

It's at a High School where three students, played by two teenage boys and one girl, encounter various forms of harrassment from pushing, to taunting, and in the girl's case her locker is plastered with stickers with words like 'dyke' on them. It really upset RMD1, that students were so bothered by the treatment that they contemplated suicide, and it went so far as showing the girl holding a gun to her own head. Unfortunately, the video went on like that for the majority of time, it wasn't until the last few seconds that students stopped themselves. Neither did the video show what happened to the bullies.

[The Hen]

Perhaps it might help to not use potentially hurtful names to describe her sexuality, even if you aren't talking to her.

You had already described her as outting herself completely as not being the problem, as if it possibly could have been considered a problem by people here. (Well, maybe one).

However that, together with describing her sexuality in the way you did, has lent an impression to me that perhaps you aren't as accepting of those amongst us who are girls who like girls.

If this is an incorrect impression, then I apologise.

[Lord Jim]

Perhaps it might help to not use potentially hurtful names to describe her sexuality, even if you aren't talking to her.

Well,I'm going to come a bit to LoCa's defense on this point...

I have used language describing some folks from RL (particularly some members of Kelly's extended family and my brother-in-law) in these forums over the years that I would never use with them in a ftf situation...

And my use of colorful language on these forums does not necessarily reflect how I treat these folks in real life...


(In fact I use a lot of language on this board that I don't use in home since I've had small children around.)

[The Hen]

Faiy nuff. I was probably reading too much into the attitude. I have already apologized.

For the record, I use the same language on and off the board. But I say 'cunt' a lot more in real life.

[Gob]

I can't find the video, because I can't recall the title, but I can remember the story scene:

It's at a High School where three students, played by two teenage boys and one girl, encounter various forms of harrassment from pushing, to taunting, and in the girl's case her locker is plastered with stickers with words like 'dyke' on them. It really upset RMD1, that students were so bothered by the treatment that they contemplated suicide, and it went so far as showing the girl holding a gun to her own head. Unfortunately, the video went on like that for the majority of time, it wasn't until the last few seconds that students stopped themselves. Neither did the video show what happened to the bullies.

Take your pick. But I think you have the wrong band name.

[loCAtek]

You are correct; in asking my roommate what band was in that video, she had replied 'Rise Against'. Enough of a memory fade, and I thought she had said, 'Rage against the Machine'. Asking her again, helped me find the video;

[Gob]

Thank you for admitting that.

[Scooter]

I don't see how anyone can interpret the message of that video as anything but ANTI-bullying and intended to give hope to kids who are being bullied, particularly since the last part of the video shows the kids who were bullied having created fabulous lives for themselves. Sure, the images of the kids being bullied are disturbing but it couldn't be clearer whose side the song is taking.

Bang, bang go the coffin nails, like a breath exhaled,
Then gone forever.
It seems like just yesterday, how did I miss the red flags raised?
Think back to the days we laughed.
We braved these bitter storms together.
Brought to his knees he cried,
But on his feet he died.

What God would damn a heart?
And what God drove us apart?

What God could make it stop?
Let this end.
Eighteen years pushed to the ledge.
It's come to this,
A weightless step.
On the way down singing,
Woah, woah.

Bang, bang from the closet walls,
The schoolhouse halls,
The shotgun's loaded.
Push me and I'll push back.
I'm done asking, I demand.

From a nation under God,
I feel its love like a cattle prod.
Born free, but still they hate.
Born me, no I can't change.

It's always darkest just before the dawn.
So stay awake with me, let's prove them wrong.

Make it stop.
Let this end,
Eighteen years pushed to the ledge.
It's come to this,
A weightless step.
On the way down singing,
Woah, woah.

The cold river washed him away,
But how could we forget?
The gatherings hold candles, but not their tongues.

And too much blood has flown from the wrists,
Of the children shamed for those they chose to kiss.
Who will rise to stop the blood?

We're calling for,
Insisting on, a different beat, yeah.
A brand new song.

Whoa, whoa [x3]
(Tyler Clementi, age 18.
Billy Lucas, age 15.
Harrison Chase Brown, age 15
Cody J. Barker, age 17
Seth Walsh, age 13.)

Make it stop,
Let this end.
This life chose me, I'm not lost in sin.
But proud I stand of who I am,
I plan to go on living.

Make it stop,
Let this end,
All these years pushed to the ledge,
But proud I stand, of who I am,
I plan to go on living

And not showing what happened to the bullies is a great way of saying that they don't count for shit.

[alice]

I agree with Scooter
What a powerful clip . very strong message.

And there is a link at the end of the film clip : http://www.itgetsbetter.org/ - the pledge of the organisation is "Everyone deserves to be respected for who they are. I pledge to spread this message to my friends, family and neighbors. I'll speak up against hate and intolerance whenever I see it, at school and at work. I'll provide hope for lesbian, gay, bi, trans and other bullied teens by letting them know that "It Gets Better."

I haven't had time to look around the site yet, but I'm guessing that letting the RMD1 child watch that youtube clip in a supportive environment, let her feel the injustice that the clip is trying to portray, and then let her go to the itgetsbetter site. This may help her, and you, and her mum, to come to terms - if her life path involves lesbianism, or if she is feeling bullied or harrassed over any other issue.

To Rise Against


edit to change 'folm' to 'film'

[alice]

PS - I agree with what Scooter says also in that:

...And not showing what happened to the bullies is a great way of saying that they don't count for shit.

... and I thought that also maybe the hope is to let some of those kids that would normally taunt and bully might see that there are consequences for a 'little bit of teasing' or a bit of 'harmless fun', or 'just roughing up a bit'. Most teens in those situations aren't trying to drive people to suicide - they're just being cruel and thoughtless. Maybe after seeing such film clips and having the message spread by such celebrity figures, a few will at the very least stop their actions because they don't want to be responsible for the consequences. Even if only a few stopped, that would be a little better. And that would start the path to encouraging others to stop, etc etc ... There's a famous saying that I can't remember - change happens a step at a time, or the ocean is filled by many drops of water falling one at a time, or some such. It's very profound anyway!!

[Gob]

Interestingly, last night on the "biggest loser" they had a cocktail party for the remaining four contestants, where they got to meet potential suitors, without wanting to go into too much details.)

One contestant, Margie, was introduced to ten potential female suitors, one she hit it off with quite nicely.

So good to see lesbian women being allowed to flirt and express desire for each other on prime time TV. (7.30 pm.)



If that doesn't help break down prejudice noting will.

(Unfortunately Margie really has the hots for her trainer!)

She won it!!!

Margie Cummins is no longer grossly obese, struggling financially or looking for love after winning The Biggest Loser Singles.



Cummins took home $220,000 on Tuesday night for shedding the highest percentage of body weight, 46 per cent, on the Network Ten reality show.

Overall, Cummins lost more than 73kg to drop from 159.1kg to 85.9kg during the course of the series, defeating Alex Zorzi who shed 72.2kg to weigh in at 89.4kg for the final episode.

Adding to the excitement of her win, Cummins, who is openly gay, has now started dating.

"It was through mutual friends here in Brisbane who have been harping on to me about her for a long time," Cummins told AAP.

"But when I was so fat the last thing I wanted to do was be with someone.

"I suppose when I came home and went out a couple of times with them (my friends) that's how we met up again."

Cummins, who is the third consecutive female winner of The Biggest Loser, will use her windfall to take a holiday, pay bills and part of her mortgage while keeping enough aside to buy time for her next move.

Before entering the weight-loss show, Cummins sold off her pizza restaurant, leaving her unemployed.

One avenue open to her is being a motivational speaker for other people wanting to lose weight, while the least likely path is reopening a fast-food outlet.

She said the thought of being a role model was the furthest from her mind until she left the Biggest Loser compound and returned to Brisbane before the final.

"Since I have been out of the house and especially leading up to the finale, the amount of people who have stopped me in the street and have gotten all emotional and started telling me how inspirational I am, I didn't realise that I had people watching," Cummins said.

"I never thought about that. For me it was getting through every week in one way, shape or form.

"If I can help anyone, even if it's only one person, then that would be fantastic."

Cummins said when she entered the show she was a size 26 and has dropped down to "about a 12 to 14".

"Quite often I used to dress in things that made me look like a very colourful tent, but that's a thing of the past as I can go into any shop now and I know something will fit," she