A Despicable Family

[liberty]

Perhaps you are not familiar the English boxwood family and I wish I had made their Acquaintance. They are a despicable immigrant family of herbicidal killers and destroyers personal property. I believe they come from England. And I normally like the English, but not these. They have absolutely no respect for property rights. They have encamped on my property on the other side of the creek and started killing my oak trees. I don’t like violence, but I naturally like anyone want to protect my property. Does any one have any suggestions on how I can get rid of the invaders?

[rubato]

Roundup?

yrs,
rubato

[Guinevere]

Can't be English boxwood. It's slow growing, doesn't get terribly tall, highly susceptible to disease, and just not that hardy - especially in your warm climate.

Take a clipping to your extension agent and they can identify it and tell you what to do about it.

[liberty]

Roundup?

yrs,
rubato

They grow up to 12 to 14 feet high; I think that would require a commercial sprayer and a lot more chemical than I want on my land.

[wesw]

make boxes?

[MajGenl.Meade]

Turn and run,
Nothing can stop them,
Around every river and canal their power is growing.
Stamp them out,
We must destroy them.
They infiltrate each city with their thick dark warning odour.
They are invincible,
They seem immune to all our herbicidal battering.

Long ago in the Russian hills,
A Victorian explorer found the regal Hogweed by a marsh,
He captured it and brought it home.
Botanical creature stirs, seeking revenge.
Royal beast did not forget.
He came home to London,
And made a present of the Hogweed to the Royal Gardens at Kew.

Waste no time,
They are approaching.
Hurry now, we must protect ourselves and find some shelter.
Strike by night,
They are defenceless.
They all need the sun to photosensitize their venom.
Still they're invincible,
Still they're immune to all our herbicidal battering.

Fashionable country gentlemen had some cultivated wild gardens,
In which they innocently planted the Giant Hogweed throughout the land.
Botanical creature stirs, seeking revenge.
Royal beast did not forget.
Soon they escaped, spreading their seed, preparing for an onslaught, threatening the human race.

Mighty Hogweed is avenged.
Human bodies soon will know anger.
Kill them with your Hogweed hairs
HERACLEUM MANTEGAZZIANI
Giant Hogweed lives

[Joe Guy]

The English Boxwood is a dwarf plant. If they are 12 to 14 feet high, you've got some giant dwarfs on your property. Their size and aggressiveness could be indicative that they have crossbred with triffids. You might want to contact the National Guard instead of your County's Agricultural Extension.

[Guinevere]

Which is pretty much what I said. It can't be English boxwood.

[Lord Jim]

You might want to contact the National Guard instead of your County's Agricultural Extension.

Or call Janette Scott...

[Big RR]

Jim--Or at least Karen Goodwin. Scott may not be in the proper frame of mind to fight the plants, worrying more about the Crack in the World and the new moon created.

[rubato]

Have you tried fire? Or goats! Goats are very good. They even eat poison oak.


yrs,
rubato

[wesw]

los cabros viejos son numero uno!!! bueno rubato , bueno!!!

[wesw]

si, hablo mucho mierda... en espanol!!!!!

[wesw]

no hablo en English solo. yo se mierda en muchas linguas.

[wesw]

no hablo en francais , solo en el bano

[liberty]

I thought I might have some fun putting you guys on, but I recon I am not much of a conman; I was too concerned with being fair and violated the first of the conman: Never give the sucker an even break. I am just not that type I recon, so back to the problem:

Meade seams to think it is another scrub so perhaps our first goal should be to first identify our enemy before I am surrounded and taken prisoner. If the general and others could post pictures of the leaf pattern that would help to identify the plant. I thought there were two English boxwoods, the common and the dwarf version, I thought mine was the first. And it could be just Boxwood that orientated in Southern Europe that could have come here with the Italian immigrants at the turn of the twentieth century.

Here is what I know and suspect about the plant: Wes as a southerner might recognize it before anyone else. It has been used as a hedge around here as a long time. Where it has escaped yards it grows wild. It grows as round evergreen bush. Leaflet are about 12 inches long with an odd number of small shield shaped leaves on both side of the twig. The wood is white, fine grained, springy and some what oily and waxy. I thought I had identified it as English boxwood in a book, but could not get a good look at the leafs pattern. Around here I have heard it simply called hedge.

[liberty]

Giant Hogweed lives

No, General it is not Hogweed, leaves not the same.

[Gob]

Ask Harold the barrel.

[wesw]

you ve got me liberty, I m more a mid atlantic guy, it just feels southern around here. of course when I lived in mass. everyone assumed that the eastern shore bordered Georgia....

[kristina]

You might google both boxwood and privet to look at images of the foliage, as well as taking Guin's very good suggestion about the County Extension Service. I have several privet trees in the side yard, and they are a serious pest tree. Thankfully, they are dying, and will be cut down soon.


eta: I also have boxwood in the yard (planted by the landlord), and while I don't particularly like it, it's very easy to keep under control.