Plan B Forum

As of 8/3/2020, our County Health Officer has officially closed all barber shops, nail salons, churches, fitness centers and more. But today I went and got my first haircut since early March. As per our illegal plan, I put on a baseball cap and face mask and drove to a place where I casually walked into a building that houses a barber shop. It has no storefront on the sidewalk. I called from an area just inside the front door and a masked woman came downstairs and took my temperature and her own and showed it to me. I passed. She passed too.

Up the stairs and then down some other stairs I followed her and we entered a room where a touchless hand sanitizer awaited my handless touching and my hands became touchingly sterile. A barber chair was wiped clean in front of me and a fresh clean protective smock kinda barber thingie was put around myself.

I removed my hat and put it into a sterile box nearby.

I sat still in the chair for a period of time as my hair was carefully trimmed. Some dropped cleanly onto my smock thingie and the rest fell to the floor below. Occasionally, the barberette would sweep my floored hair trimmings to a container that had a built in vacuum with no hose, but had an entrance at the bottom that sucked hair from the floor and made it disappear. At the end of the meeting, I placed my hat back on my head, thanked her, placed an envelope full of unmarked bills on her counter, used the touchless sanitizer one last time and was then escorted up and down steps to the front door, which I didn't touch, and I walked to my car and drove home.

I'm now a criminal but my hair is perfect. Please don't tell anybody. Thanks.

There was a case in the south, can’t recall which state, where two covid19 positive hairstylists performed cuts on ~150 customers but not a single one was infected. All parties wore masks, so it seems to show the efficacy of mask wearing as a preventative. I’m not sure why that case isn’t cited more in response to antimasker rhetoric, but I guess those folks wouldn’t listen to anything anyway.

I recently got my first cut since the pandemic - actually, my first haircut in about a year and a half. My hair had gotten so long it was driving me absolutely mad, taking far too long to deal with in the shower and feeling like a heavy weight. I got it cut back to a chin length bob and am loving the ease of it - only bummer is it will require far more frequent haircuts to keep it this way.

Stylists are open here but the wait is long as they’re still catching up all the women who are desperate for the full color/cut & whatever treatment. So I went to my cousin’s MIL’s for a free family haircut in her kitchen. She’s a retired stylist and still does a pretty good job, although she talks a blue streak and sometimes that distracts her I think - I had to trim up one side the next day at home because it was a half inch longer than the other side and that’s pretty noticeable with a chin length bob.

Neither of us masked because they’re in my extended family bubble and don’t get out much at all - but it felt a bit weird and I’ve been a bit nervous since. I have to get Covid tested again at the hospital next Tuesday for a medical procedure I’m having Thursday, so I’ll know then that I’m definitely virus free and I will feel better.

I miss the old pre-pandemic world a lot. It was fucked up, but not like this.

I'm beginning to look like Worzel Gummage. Barbers are open here, but I'm putting it off for now.



Hen actually likes me being long haired and bearded, but she's in Aus so I'll have to grow it back before she returns should I get it cut.

And Worzel Gummage, what does he look like?

I got a haircut about 3 weeks ago...it's grown out, but started as a 3/4" crewcut, so isn't too bad.