McSweeney’s MAY 26, 2017
THE OXFORD COMMA’S ONLINE DATING PROFILE
by MOLLY COLLINS
Full Name: Oxford Stanford Comma
Nickname (s): Real, slim, and shady
Age: Debated
Height: 12 pt.
Body Type: Curvy
Occupation: Point of Clarification
Seeking: Adjectives, verbs, and participles within a 0.1-centimeter radius.
About Me
I recently moved to this paragraph, so I don’t know any punctuation here. I’ve got a sequence of esteemed, beloved, and admirable attributes. In my previous clause, I was heralded as staunch, stout, and necessary. I’m one with which to have a good, great, and grand time, and I’m in touch with my wants, needs, and emotions, and I’m not afraid to get declarative, imperative, interrogative, and exclamatory for a pretty, prim, and proper part of speech. I need a babe, baby, or bae that likes to tour, travel, and trip to exotic locales, locations, and luxurious destinations and even fancies the quainter quests, like hanging out On the Banks of Plum Creek, cuddling on the side of a Cold Mountain, and forgiving me for getting her Lost in Tokyo.
Likes
Gouda, Havarti, and Brie; Feta, Mozzarella, and Cheddar; Ricotta, Swiss, and Muenster; Manchego, Gorgonzola, and Provolone; Roquefort, Taleggio, and Pecorino Romano; The Corrections.
Dislikes
Pretentious Proper Nouns
Just Meade’s Type
Just Meade’s Type
Last edited by BoSoxGal on Tue May 24, 2022 12:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.
For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring.
~ Carl Sagan
~ Carl Sagan
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MajGenl.Meade
- Posts: 20748
- Joined: Sun Apr 25, 2010 8:51 am
- Location: Groot Brakrivier
- Contact:
Re: Just Meade’s Type
, , and .For Christianity, by identifying truth with faith, must teach-and, properly understood, does teach-that any interference with the truth is immoral. A Christian with faith has nothing to fear from the facts
Re: Just Meade’s Type
For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring.
~ Carl Sagan
~ Carl Sagan
Re: Just Meade’s Type
One thing I see all the time is, “ The car was my husband and I’s. “. It makes me want to poke my eyes out. Or their I’s.
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MajGenl.Meade
- Posts: 20748
- Joined: Sun Apr 25, 2010 8:51 am
- Location: Groot Brakrivier
- Contact:
Re: Just Meade’s Type
Back on line after hiatus . . . love the cartoon, me and the wife both.
For Christianity, by identifying truth with faith, must teach-and, properly understood, does teach-that any interference with the truth is immoral. A Christian with faith has nothing to fear from the facts
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Econoline
- Posts: 9557
- Joined: Sun Apr 18, 2010 6:25 pm
- Location: DeKalb, Illinois...out amidst the corn, soybeans, and Republicans
Re: Just Meade’s Type
Meade - You might want to pre-order a tombstone similar to this:
People who are wrong are just as sure they're right as people who are right. The only difference is, they're wrong.
— God @The Tweet of God
— God @The Tweet of God