Plan B Forum

You ever learn something about someone you have to deal with that so degrades your opinion of that person that you wish just remain in ignorance instead of having to go through life knowing what that person has done?

I'm at that point with my mother in law. After this last bit of information I don't think I'm going to be able to hide my disgust when I look at her anymore.

I'm a fairly forgiving guy (been told by some that i'm too forgiving) but at this point my compassion for this person has completely dried up.

Some history When I first met her She seemed nice enough a little nieve which is somewhat understandable haviing lived the small town life her entire life coupled with some low self esteem issues which I had pegged to verbal and emotional abuse from her ex husband which at the very least was also physicaly intimidating due to his size and build. Despite being a horrible cook she seemed quite happy in her life with her second husband.

My Wife was more or less estranged from her father at the time and I heard all bout how her fathers irrational behavior alcoholism and other anti-social behavior which eventually led to him being incarcerated and commited for a short time. Not to mention the toll this put on her brother (the youngest) who was left in his care after the divorce. (just to give you some clue about how phisically intimidating this guy could be when he was bouncing at his brothers bar one of the patrons had told her brotherhow he had severd some time with him and everyone in the place was scared of him.

I see by the time I'm going to have to finish this when I get home.

to be continued....

Keeping us all in suspense?

(drive safely on your way home).

Hence, the maxim "ignorance is bliss".

Indeed, I'm the most "blissful" person I know.

Grabs popcorn. Takes seat.

Yep, this could be a doozey...

Should we institute a "Rant of the Month" award?

What we have going on here is a last straw situation. If I just started with my MIL did "X" I'm completely disgusted with her many would be inclined to believe I'm overreacting and being unreasonable. So I must show this is just the last nail in the coffin and containing the camel with a broken back.

Long Run wrote:Hence, the maxim "ignorance is bliss".

The maxim is "IF ignorance is bliss tis folly to be wise."

I don't know why people get that one so wrong all the time.

yrs,
rubato

Gob wrote:Yep, this could be a doozey...

Should we institute a "Rant of the Month" award?

So where was I?

Shortly after I met her Ems Mom started hinting that she wasn't entirely happy in her second marriage and it was about this time I learned that her current husband was a former friend of her ex and they had started dating shortly after the divorce. (A little harsh) The reason she presented for her current marital problems was her husbands poor money handling. (not that she was good with it either she sold a new truck with a years of payments left for a older car in far worse condition because it would save her money since it was $10 cheaper a month.... for 5 years) So she left her husband and shortly after the divorce was final she admitted that the real reason she left him without a hint of shame and remorse was that she didn't want to take care of him in his (rapidly) failing health. (not everyone can deal with that type of situation)

It was about this time that Em's brother got addicted to crack and embezzled about $50 grand. Luckly He came to his senses shortly before he was arrested turned himself in and worked a deal. this is when my wife (then GF) let me know that when her parents divorced her mother never even sought custody of him and moved into a two bedroom apartment for Her mother and sister ensuring that He had nowhere else to go other in the care of an obviously unstable alcoholic. (oh well we all make mistakes)

Time for the court cate We drive out to Ionia and on the way Em lets me know that her dad is going to be there. After all I'd heard about the guy I'm not too enthused about meeting the guy. The only good thing I'd heard about him it he quit drinking since he met his new wife. Court goes as expected (plea was accepted and moved on to sentencing) Afterward we her father and her uncle (different one that owns the bar her Grandmother was a devout catholic Big Family) go to Big Boy. Em stood up to her dad and confronted him about his past behavior and amazingly they came to a reconciliation. (Em credits me for my support I don't think I did anything)

Time passes Ems brother gets 6 months and (out in three for good behavior spent his time getting clean and taking stock in his life) provided he pays restitution.

to be continued next lunch....

This is fascinating.

You should be called Scheherazade.

This is the family I married into.

Dude. This is small potatoes comparative to my family history. Not that I don't feel your pain CP and that you don't have a legitimate complaint... but this ain't shit.

Just remember; I cried because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.

Just saying. All things are relative. Buck up little camper. This too shall pass.

There's a saying from the village where my mother grew up - Se li guaje si venesse in piazze, ognune s'aripiesse li sì.

Roughly translated - If troubles were put out for sale in the marketplace, everyone would take back their own.

I like that Scooter~

There's a saying from my mother's village too; "Ooh look at her, who does she think she is then with her airs and graces, thinks she's better than us she does, that's her all over, all fur coat and no knickers..."

It doesn't make sense in this context, but still I thought I'd share...

Gob wrote:There's a saying from my mother's village too; "Ooh look at her, who does she think she is then with her airs and graces, thinks she's better than us she does, that's her all over, all fur coat and no knickers..."

It doesn't make sense in this context, but still I thought I'd share...

In my home village the saying is "Ooh look at her, who does she think she is then with her airs and graces, thinks she's better than us she does, that's her all over, all hat and no knickers..."

I'd love a rant of the month award - I'd probably enter several times a month

I think it's a great idea. Monthly nominations and a poll...



...lowest polling ranter gets voted off the board...

1st I'm not complaining about my in-laws I hold great affection for a handful of them I like most, indifferent about a few dislike one and now totally dislike another. I just took exception that this is just a "story".

2nd This ain't the half of the fucked up things in my life (and I still onsider myself blessed) I'm only giving the pertinent rundown of the events that have shaped my views vis-a-vis my MIL which entails touching on alot of the other events that have happened to my other inlaws but by no means flushes them out in full detail.

Now to continue with my rant....

After her second divorce My MIL moved into a two bedroom apartment close to her work started wlking to work (weather permitting) and excersizing routinely and in her weekly phone calls to my wife she regailed to her (in addition to a detailed list of everything she ate and how she felt about it) about all of her "gentlemen callers" she was getting at work. (she works at a gas station) Which she thought was just peachy including the truck driver that solicted her for a BJ in the parking lot. (My wife had to tell her that was extremely inappropriate and was forced to give her mother "the sex talk" much to her own mortification.)

Meanwile Her brother now out of Jail and living in a shithole one room apartment in Lansing trying desperately to support himself while making Escalade sized restitution payments on minimum wage jobs (it's kind of hard to get anything else with a felony embezzlement conviction on your record) lest he get sent back to jail. gets infomed late one friday night that he's getting evicted in desperation he gives his mother a call asking for help finding a place to stay. (she lives alone in a two bedroom apartment and frequently complains how money is a little tight) She directs him to the State emergency housing authority (I forget the exact name) (:roll:) (note: this is the second time she's left her youngest child to the wolves) When my Wife finds out she's furious and quite rightly tells her mother off. We offer to take him in though due to our local economy and the increased cost of living he declines. He ends up stripping until a former employer hears of his situation and takes him on as an apprentice plumber making enough money to provide a decent living for himself and make his restitution payments.

Continued sometime tonight or tomorrow....

(edited to remove the "bed" from me BILs apt.