Welfare was not low enough

[loCAtek]

The Octomom has turned to stripping;

Octomom Nadya Suleman stripped down Friday night like it was her job ... because it was ... and TMZ has obtained the pics to prove it.

After months of anticipation, Octo finally had her first gig as a stripper and hit the stage at Playhouse Gentleman's Club in Hallandale, FL for TWO WHOLE DANCES!!!

Even though her time on stage was short, the mother of 14 went all out -- using costumes, props and we're guessing a gym ... cause girl didn't look half-bad.

Octo went with a couple classic stripper numbers -- dancing as a leather-clad dominatrix (set to Rihanna's song "S&M") and then a naughty, lollipop sucking school girl.

Looks like she's already a pro. Yay?

...And porn;

Well, the coming of the Apocalypse might be a Mayan long con, and I'm not sure we're ever going to see a Porky's re-boot in my lifetime, but there is one thing for certain -- the Octomom porn is coming tomorrow, and we've got an early look.

Now, I know what you're thinking. Do I really want to see the lady nest of a woman with fourteen children and a penchant for slightly to decidedly crazy states of mental being? Of course you do.

Or you don't, but you will, because you don't want to be the only dude at the office who hasn't seen Nadya Suleman friggin' the heck out of herself in Wicked Pictures 'Octomom: Home Alone'. Which for the record, is a genius title, only the role of 'Kevin' is now being played by a long metal rod that takes batteries. Such is progress.

If you following the links, in this article NSFW you will hear such award winning dialogue as, "Oh, oh my god." done with the drama of an over-loaded dishwasher!

[Scooter]

What's wrong with stripping and porn, if it puts food on her kids' plates and clothes on their backs? Would it have been more dignified for her to be droning "would you like fries with that" 450 times every day, for a tenth or less of the money?

[loCAtek]

Well, what happened to all the money from book deals and reality TV gigs? Where did all the donations from well-wishers go?
To her plastic surgeon for the triple tummy tuck?

[Joe Guy]

She's once, twice, eight times a lady,

She's missing a screw....

No... That's not right...

She obviously hasn't missed very many screws.

[BoSoxGal]

There should be civil litigation on behalf of the kids against the fertility doctor; take everything he's got to benefit those kids.

How does a mother of fourteen work?!?! Stripping or McDonald's - neither makes any sense.

That whole situation just makes me want to puke. Poor kids.

[Jarlaxle]

Wonder who paid for her cosmetic surgery. I suspect, minimum, a tummy tuck and breast implants.

[Joe Guy]

What's wrong with stripping and porn, if it puts food on her kids' plates and clothes on their backs?

Oh nothin' I guess. I'm sure her kids will always appreciate knowing their mother is a porn star. It will build character and make them proud.

It would make an interesting report for the fifth grader on "What my parent does for a living" day.

Besides food on the table, the other benefits to her children are endless.

[Scooter]

They could be proud of the fact that their mother is doing her best to make an honest living, without taking from or cheating or otherwise hurting anyone else. Of course, if others choose to make her kids feel bad about that, because of the barbed sticks up their own asses, then that says a lot more about them than it does about her.

[Joe Guy]

They could be proud of the fact that their mother is doing her best to make an honest living, without taking from or cheating or otherwise hurting anyone else. Of course, if others choose to make her kids feel bad about that, because of the barbed sticks up their own asses, then that says a lot more about them than it does about her.

It says a little something about Octopornmom when she chooses to make money by starring in sleazy films polishing knobs and getting a gooey face and all those fun things. A great role model for her children, that one.

And of course kids will laugh and make fun and worst of all, watch those films to see the kids' mother "acting".

What you are calling an "honest living" is a mother of 14 being a whore on the movie screen.

What you call "without taking from or cheating or otherwise hurting anyone else" is an incorrect assumption that it won't have any affect on her children. It will also lead to a change in the kind of people she associates with and the way that people who knew her before will now perceive her to be.

If my mother needed to work when I was a child, I would have been proud of her if she worked at McDonald's or any kind of restaurant. I would be embarrassed and ashamed if she were making porno movies.

[Scooter]

It says a little something about Octopornmom when she chooses to make money by starring in sleazy films polishing knobs and getting a gooey face and all those fun things. A great role model for her children, that one.

What it says is that she is willing to do what she has to in order to take care of her kids. What's wrong with that?

And of course kids will laugh and make fun and worst of all, watch those films to see the kids' mother "acting".

Kids make fun of other kids for all sorts of reasons related to their parents. By your logic, same-sex couples should not have kids then, because there will be a lot of kids laughing and making fun and calling both the parents and the kids ugly names.

What you are calling an "honest living" is a mother of 14 being a whore on the movie screen.

And what, exactly, is not honest about being a whore for a living? I always thought that getting paid for providing a service that is in demand is what capitalism is all about. Is capitalism inherently dishonest, then?

What you call "without taking from or cheating or otherwise hurting anyone else" is an incorrect assumption that it won't have any affect on her children. It will also lead to a change in the kind of people she associates with and the way that people who knew her before will now perceive her to be.

So she should not provide for her kids in the best way she knows how, because other people have their own fucked up hangups about sex? I went to school with a kid whose father was a garbage collector, other kids made fun of that all the time and I'm sure people looked down on the father because of his profession. Should he have chosen another line of work that wouldn't have paid as well because of that?

If my mother needed to work when I was a child, I would have been proud of her if she worked at McDonald's or any kind of restaurant. I would be embarrassed and ashamed if she were making porno movies.

If you would have been ashamed of your mother for trying her best to take care of you, that would have made you an ungrateful brat who didn't deserve her.

[Joe Guy]

What it says is that she is willing to do what she has to in order to take care of her kids. What's wrong with that?

So she is forced to be a porno star to take care of her kids? How's that work?

Kids make fun of other kids for all sorts of reasons related to their parents. By your logic, same-sex couples should not have kids then, because there will be a lot of kids laughing and making fun and calling both the parents and the kids ugly names.

That's not my logic. That's you putting words in my mouth.

And what, exactly, is not honest about being a whore for a living? I always thought that getting paid for providing a service that is in demand is what capitalism is all about. Is capitalism inherently dishonest, then?

I wasn't aware that whores have a code of honor. Maybe it is honest to fake orgasms for a living and have a man stick his wiener up your ass while you suck someone else off, but I've never quite perceived it that way.

So she should not provide for her kids in the best way she knows how, because other people have their own fucked up hangups about sex?

If that's the best way she knows how to earn money, maybe she should rethink her situation and try to learn something more practical.

I went to school with a kid whose father was a garbage collector, other kids made fun of that all the time and I'm sure people looked down on the father because of his profession. Should he have chosen another line of work that wouldn't have paid as well because of that?

I think it's odd that people would make fun of a garbage collector. They are hard working people. My father had friends that worked in the city as garbage collectors. They made good money. If my father had been a garbage collector it certainly wouldn't have bothered me.

If you would have been ashamed of your mother for trying her best to take care of you, that would have made you an ungrateful brat who didn't deserve her.

I would not consider my mother being a porno star "trying her best to take care of" me. My mother would have found work that didn't involve giving blow jobs while being filmed. That line of work is not the best job for a parent. And until I read it here I didn't think anyone believed porno acting was making an honest living. I always thought it was sleazy and somewhat dangerous.

[Crackpot]

To be fair Joe it seems to be billed as a "solo" outing, but, the way things are going I doubt she won't cross further lines.

My issue isn't so much with what she's doing but her seeming pattern of behavior of irresponsible decisions taking they path of least resistance to the bottom rung of society rather than rising to the occasion. Face it, being who and what she is, she will not be working her way to Jenna Jameson type fame and fortune, rather than taking the much trodden path to the abyss that so many have. Heck she won't even get the "few good years" that most porn actresses get she will only make anything as long as she's willing to sink to deeper and deeper depths of degradation feeding the worst aspects of our collective psyches.