Plan B Forum

...for the end of the world

I just watched this movie on Netflix. Steve Carrel and Kiera Knightley starred. It's an odd rom/com altogether - plot holes abound but one needs to just suspend disbelief. What is there is a very affecting look at the discovery of relationship; the value of time (or the lack of it); the redemptive power of love.

OK, I had a tear in my eye at the end. It made me think of my wife and our life; of who I would be if the world were known to be irrevocably destroyed in 21 days. How would people react? There are the predictable and many unpredictable glimpses in this movie

Overall: I think it a worthy effort and good value for the time invested in it

I enjoyed it as well; it's a bit silly at points (with those gaping plot holes), but worth the watch.

Never heard of it.

oldr - you have now.

Aside from the age-old question of how a small monoplane would reach Surrey from the USA.... well, aside from that, no small part of this movie's purpose is the obvious fact that each one of us is faced with certain early termination.

We don't know when exactly - could be now or years from now. Should we not in view of this, live as we should live? I don't suggest stupid debauchery which, as the movie shows, is bankrupt. I'm thinking of this in relationship to my daughter (step-daughter, technically).

She's 42 years old, owes money all over (although probably less than $5K in total) and will never dig herself out. The kinds of things she's good at (looking after old people*; organizing camps for the disadvantaged; food kitchens, that kind of thing) don't (and will never) pay nearly enough to provide surplus. She gets by on rent (subsidized), petrol, food, and that's about it. The van is about clapped out. Her hours with patients keep getting cut down. She has a good heart. She's also the kind of girl who won't do anything that might damage her nails.

My wife (her mother) says: "She's got to learn/better job/benefits/pay off debt/save." These are good points of course

But I'm wondering. $5K to me is readily available - I took a lump-sum pension. When wife and I die, the two kids will probably inherit a bit (not a fortune but a bit). Why wait until we die? Why shouldn't I give my son (a good army lad) and my (step) daughter a gift now? The same each. Except I sit with my daughter and insist that she pay off all of her debt - she can write the checks and I'll mail them. She starts over at ground zero (which actually she never has started at - she's always been behind).


*and no, she's not going to be wiping the arse of this old person - not as long as I can fight it, anyway!

If you're not in a position where you're really worried about needing that money later, go for it. Since your stepdaughter has need of the money right now (and you're going to make sure she uses it correctly) you might consider just telling your son what you're doing and why, and letting him decide whether he wants his share now or later. Just a thought.

It sounds and looks (here's the trailer) like a very interesting movie. I'll try to watch it soon.

I ve already given my son my great grandmother s uncirculated gold coin that she got for her birthday in 1910, and many fabrication tools that I may have a use for someday, but that he has a use for now.

he has more money than me, but I try to give all that I can to him now, and help him anyway I can.

as long as they ain t gonna smoke it all up in crack, why not?

You can gift them each up to $14,000/year, without tax consequences, although I believe those gifts get counted against the total value of your estate at the end --- so keep records especially if the total estate value will be over $5MM+

If you can, why not? It won't ruin them, and it may give them a little comfort or ease, too.

Guin, unless it's changed recently, those annual gifts of up to $14,000 are exempt from estate tax (and at least most state inheritance taxes). Anything in excess is not counted if the gift tax is paid.

Meade--if it could help her and you can afford it, why not do it? However, only you can tell if it will really help; you don't want her to see it as found money and run up her debt again.

Thanks all - well that's the problem, Big RR... in a way. I'll burn a lot of capital (relational) to persuade my wife that it's a reasonable idea. (I'm the soft touch, believe it or not). If our daughter then runs up the debt again.... well, her mother will not rub my face in it but it will always be the elephant in the room!

I would have to package it as gifting both daughter and son $5,000 just because I want to - not because I want to remove her debt. My son probably would defer it to later, if I gave him the choice. But that defeats my "camouflage" - which of course fools no one who does not "want" to be fooled! Sometimes you have to have that fig-leaf so the "want to be fooled" can slide on by

well, you could show up with a nice mini van, which will give some relief, and let her deal with her own debts....

you can give the boy your old coonskin cap and long rifle.....

the problem wes is that some people are not helped by aid well-meaning people give them. I have a brother who sounds a bit like Meade's daughter, only more so. to top it off he's a tea partier who lives off scamming others and the welfare system he decries. A number of years back he found himself and his family homeless and, having tapped out the good will of family members and friends, he went to social services who set him up in an apartment, paid the security and the first 3 months rent, and offered further rental assistance. After about 6 months he broke his lease and moved out, losing the month and a half security (nearly $2000(; his answer--I didn't pay it so I lost nothing. In that case a well intentioned helping hand did not help at all in the long term.

Yeah, that's cold. I'm afraid of similar, though less intended, results. My daughter is sharp and fuzzy at the same time.

She knows all the angles on welfare type things; rent subsidies, shelters, food stamps, health care - if the government does it, she's the expert.

OTOH... "I don't understand. Last year my friend Tanisha's tax preparer did my taxes free of charge but it's been eight months now and my refund check hasn't come. And his office phone isn't answered any more. My friend Tanisha says when she used to work for him he did that before and the police came. So that's why she hasn't let him do her taxes since 2002" Soft or what?

Sounds like it. It's a tough combination to deal with.

Re her taxes; have her contact the IRS and inquire where her refund is (if you check on line there's a form for it); if it has been stolen and it's not gigantic, the IRS will often just issue another check. When I was in college someone stole my refund check from my mailbox, and I got a new check.

She knows all the angles on welfare type things; rent subsidies, shelters, food stamps, health care - if the government does it, she's the expert.

I meet many of those types of people in the rooms.
They think the world owes them something.
PS
Many keep relapsing also

Just about every person I know who complains about "those people" abusing the system are also actively trying to game that same system.

oldr_n_wsr wrote:

She knows all the angles on welfare type things; rent subsidies, shelters, food stamps, health care - if the government does it, she's the expert.

I meet many of those types of people in the rooms.
They think the world owes them something.
PS
Many keep relapsing also

You do realize that in this instance who you are referring to as one of "those types" is Meade's daughter. And I'm pretty sure he was saying she has expertise in that field, to help people who qualify for public assistance actually get public assistance. Because when you're down and out, and have no phone, or internet, or clean clothes, or full belly, or safe place to sleep, sometimes even asking for help is a bridge too far.

It has been my experience that the majority of "those types" are in it for the hand out, not the hand up.
Only Meade and his daughter know which type she is.

Thanks there, Guin. And she does help people - old people, as a nurse's aide. But she's learned the ropes by pulling on 'em herself.

I tried my plan out on my wife today as we drove out to the far east of Cleveland for lunch. She appreciated my subtle plan - my money, give some to my son who's never asked for a thing, do same for daughter but spend time with her and make sure she pays of all the debt. She can write the checks and I'll mail them as we drive to her bank to pay in my gift.

My wife thinks I've come up with a plan she (my wife) can't refuse to accept

Well Meade, I wish you luck and hope for the bes; you do appear to have thought it through wellt. Maybe it will help. She does sound like she has her head screwed in at least partially right; maybe this will help straighten her out. She's your daughter so it may well be worth it.