Bring on your Dad jokes

[Econoline]

I know a lot of jokes about retired people but none of them work.

[Joe Guy]

What is the Easter Bunny's favorite restaurant?

IHOP.

[TPFKA@W]

What is brown and sticky?
A stick.

[TPFKA@W]

No matter where I go, I like to bring my ukulele, then, whenever someone asks if I play an instrument, I say... "I play a little guitar!"

[Joe Guy]

I'm not sure if this qualifies as a Dad Joke, so let me know. I have been known to lower the bar.....

At Joe's annual physical exam....

Doctor: "Do you have any health concerns?"

Joe: "Yes, Doctor. I always poop every morning at 8 o'clock."

Doctor: "How is that a problem?"

Joe: "I wake up at 9 o'clock."

[Econoline]

Three unwritten rules of life:
1.
2.
3.

[MajGenl.Meade]

What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A-flat minor

[eddieq]

You gotta hand it to short people. Literally.

[Bicycle Bill]

How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?

One?   or Two?

One .....



..... or Two?

-"BB"-

[TPFKA@W]

[Econoline]

[dales]

If your feet smell and your nose runs....

You're built upside down.

[TPFKA@W]

[Long Run]

If you’re not a father you cannot make a dad joke. Any attempt will be a faux pas.

[Joe Guy]

My ma would always sigh when I tried to make up a punny joke faux pa.

[eddieq]

Then there was the agnostic dyslexic insomniac that stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog

[eddieq]

I have a Russian friend who is a sound technician.
Also a Czech one too

[Econoline]

[Long Run]

Last night my wife asked if I had seen the dog bowl. I said, "I didn't know he could."

[TPFKA@W]