Plan B Forum

Dang it.

Here you are, saving the world for cheap grazing fees and from those dangerous birdwatchers and what sort of thanks do you get?

Dildos. Or as Jon Ritzheimer, an anti-Muslim activist is one of the men occupying the wildlife refuge in Burns, Ore., called them "a bag of dicks."

Shocking, we know, but the calls for supplies have been met with some pretty unusual offerings.



Ritzheimer called it "hate mail" in a Facebook post. Well, one man's hate mail might just be another's pleasant weekend, but we digress.

(Then, too, these guys are getting mail. Hmm, delivered by the federal government.)

Apparently he hasn't been paying attention at all the fun the Internet has been having with the occupiers.

Perhaps the donors have been reading installments of the "erotic novel" people have been contributing to and took it seriously.

But enough is enough. Ritzheimer knocks the stuff off a table and in a challenge worthy of a professional wrestler calls on patriots to join him.

Best leave those sex toys at home if you go.

The Oregon militia will soon get a 55-gallon drum of personal lubricant to go along with all those dildos they've received, courtesy of Cards Against Humanity co-founder Max Temkin.

Temkin tweeted that he purchased the lube on Amazon (They really do have everything, don't they?), and even sprung for expedited shipping. You're welcome, Oregon militia. This is what happens when you start an armed protest at a bird sanctuary, forget food and let the world know that y'all need snacks.



Temkin later tweeted: "I hope nobody shoots me with a gun."



If nothing else, this should add a few more chapters to the homoerotic fan fiction Twitter hashtag #BundyEroticFanFic.