Plan B Forum

I remember when businesses first started giving out refrigerator magnets. They've stuck around ever since.

DAD JOKES — CHRISTMAS EDITION

What happens if you eat Christmas decorations?
You get tinsel-itis.

What do Santa's helpers learn in school?
The elf-abet.

What do you call an obnoxious reindeer?
Rude-olph.

What do grapes sing at Christmas?
'Tis the season to be jelly.

What's the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has Noel.

What did the gingerbread man put on his bed?
A cookie sheet!

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Ice Crispies.

Who is never hungry at Christmas?
The turkey—he’s always stuffed.

-"BB"-

I received "The Ultimate Dad Joke" calendar for 2023 as a Christmas gift. Stay tuned.

A sampling - January 1
"I don't think the people working on the Times Square NYE celebration are doing a good job. They always drop the ball."

-"BB"-

After years of procrastinating on it, I finally started a herb garden. It's about thyme.

What kind of dog does a magician have?



A Labra-cadabrador.

-"BB"-

A man choked on mashed garbanzo beans today. Police are treating it as a hummuscide.

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.

The ceremony wasn't much but the reception was excellent.

Scooter wrote: ↑

Fri Jun 30, 2023 8:11 am

Toddlerhood - when you are still naive enough to believe that you’ll someday escape the voice of your parents.

Did you hear orthodontists are about to go on strike? Brace yourselves.

eddieq wrote: ↑

Tue Apr 25, 2023 1:25 pm

After years of procrastinating on it, I finally started a herb garden. It's about thyme.

I switched all the labels on my wife’s spice rack. I’m not in trouble yet, but the thyme is cumin.

Q: What is a tree's least favorite month?
A: Sep-TIMBERRRRRR!

The difference between a hippo and a Zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

If a bear wears shoes and socks he still has bear feet.