Plan B Forum

She of Jack Daniels breath, glitter unicorn get-up and romps with ghosts, Ke$ha, has written an autobiography. While we may have previously questioned her levels of literacy, the Ke$h-bomb now has on sale the creatively titled My Crazy Beautiful Life, which gives diehard fans (you know, the ones who supposedly send her their teeth) “an all-access pass” to her “whirlwind journey” of “being the worst actress in LA to living out my childhood dreams.” We’re sure every five-year-old with a penchant for jazz ballet and pop music dreams of spawning hits like “Blah Blah Blah” and “We R Who We R”. Anyway...

Packed with notable quotables – “The Galapagos seemed like a place trapped in prehistoric time, and y’all know I love that shit” – we skimmed through summaries of the Pulitzer-prize worthy literature, and thought, why should the fun stop at Ke$ha’s bio? She’s come out with loads of cringe-worthy drivel in the past, so there’s no point limiting The Top 20 Ke$ha quotes to a silly old book.

In defence of K-$izzle, being the purveyor of such senselessness can’t come easily. She is a prime example of a self-propagating image specialist, unless, really, she’s actually just being herself. Either way, let’s bask in the folly together, and wait with bated breath for her anticipated TV foray.

Loads of lovely dumbness here.

She of Jack Daniels breath, glitter unicorn get-up and romps with ghosts

Wake up in the morning, feelin' like P. Diddy ([Hey, what up girl?])
Grab my glasses, I'm out the door, I'm gonna hit this city ([Let's go!])
Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack
'Cause when I leave for the night, I ain't coming back

I'm talking pedicure on our toes, toes
Tryin' on all our clothes, clothes
Boys blowing up our phones, phones
Drop-topping, playing our favorite CDs
Pullin' up to the parties
Trying to get a little bit tipsy

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, imma fight
Till we see the sunlight

Tick, tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop, no
Oh, woah, oh, oh
Oh, woah, oh, oh

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, imma fight
Till we see the sunlight

Tick, tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop, no
Oh, woah, oh, oh
Oh, woah, oh, oh

Ain't got a care in world, but got plenty of beer
Ain't got no money in my pocket, but I'm already here!
And now the dudes are lining up 'cause they hear we got swagger
But we kick 'em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger

I'm talking about everybody getting crunk, crunk
Boys trying to touch my junk, junk
Gonna smack him if he getting too drunk, drunk
Now, now, we goin' till they kick us out, out
[ From: http://www.elyrics.net ]
Or the police shut us down, down
Police shut us down, down
Po-po shut us...

And now the dudes are lining up 'cause they hear we got swagger
But we kick 'em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger

Don't judge a man by his looks, it's how he... er... how much money he has... or something.

Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack

Sean wrote:What puzzles me is that there seem to be more and more song lyrics these days glorifying binge drinking and yet any reference to weed is bleeped out on the radio... sometimes in the same song.

Sean wrote:That shouldn't make it acceptable to encourage kids to binge...

Nickelback - This Afternoon

Better hang on if you're tagging along
Cause we'll be doing this 'til six in the morning
Nothing wrong with going all night long
Tough to put the brakes on, doesn't matter when you gotta
Get up and go out, me and all my friends
Drink up, fall down, then we'll do it all again
Just sitting around, hanging out this afternoon

Sean wrote:Fair enough, but should artists take greater responsibility for the impressions that they're spoon feeding to their highly impressionable young fans?