And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

[Gob]

A humorous Ebay advert for the ultimate 'proper lads car' complete with a wing mirror held on by string and 103,000 miles on the clock has gone viral.



The advert for the 13-year-old W-plate Ford Fiesta Zetec put on by 21-year-old Jamie Rogers has had more than 20,000 views since he listed it on Monday.

By 5pm today, the price for the car had rocketed to £153,900 after 64 bids.

Mr Rogers, who lives in Chelmsford, Essex and is a Recruitment Consultant in the City, wrote: 'I'm selling this Ford Fiesta Zetec S of mine because now I've grown up, I feel it's time for me to pass on this special car to another young lad on the path to manhood.

'You can't become a man until you've owned a proper lads car, so if you don't buy this Zetec S you will always be spotty, your voice will never break properly and you will never beat your addiction to masturbation.

'I'm not selling this car to help myself, I'm selling this car to save teenagers across the world from themselves.

'So if you're a teenager looking at making that next big step in your life, this is the car for you.

'If you're a parent looking for a car on behalf of your son, this is the car for you.

'If you're 35 years old still living at home and yet to be touched intimately by a woman, then this car is not for you.'

Although, Mr Rogers does concede that the Zetec is '13 years young' and has 'bounced across 103,000 miles of road to the beat of many a black rap track'.

He says you 'first test of manliness' will be fixing the dodgy clutch and wing mirror, which his drunken friend fell into after a party.

The car is also 'filthy dirty' inside and out' but Mr Rogers does say it has 'four round wheels' and has an aftermarket speaker system 'perfect for enhancing your hard-man image at low speeds in built up areas.'

He finished the advert simply with: 'You are an idiot if you're in your late teens and don't buy this car.'

Mr Rogers, who bought the car last year said: 'I had a chat with my mates about selling the car.

'In my group of friends it is the car in the worst shape.

'I said, 'I guarantee I will get £1,000 for that car'.

'Nobody believed me, so then I thought 'I have said it now how am I going to make it happen?'

'I thought maybe if I give it a quirky advert someone will buy it.'

He said his target market is young lads looking for their first car like he was and who will be excited to be having any car.

Mr Rogers is hoping to replace his car with an Audi, he said: 'I've got a proper job now, it is time for a proper car'.

[oldr_n_wsr]

At a 154 thousand, he better sell it now. Take the money and run.

[Jarlaxle]

Wait...103,000 miles is a lot?! My Jeep had 218,000 when I sold it!

[Daisy]

I suppose its about average for the UK. My coupe has 70k at 6 years old.

[Econoline]

I doubt very much whether it was maintained as well as any of Jarl's vehicles. Or maintained at all.

[Daisy]

Cars here over three years old are required to have a roadworthiness test. It means some degree of maintenance needs to be done, tyres, brakes, lights, and emissions are all checked.

[MajGenl.Meade]

By 5pm today, the price for the car had rocketed to £153,900 after 64 bids

That's not a man - that's a mucking foron!

(and several mates)

[oldr_n_wsr]

Cars here over three years old are required to have a roadworthiness test. It means some degree of maintenance needs to be done, tyres, brakes, lights, and emissions are all checked.

In NY our cars have to pass those tests every year no matter the age of the car.
ETA
There might be some exceptions to the emissions tests for cars built before there was concern about exhaust emissions.

[Econoline]

Wait...103,000 miles is a lot?! My Jeep had 218,000 when I sold it!

As I was driving at around 04:00 this morning I watched the odometer on my Sprinter turn from 399999 to 400000. First time I've ever seen that happen. WOO-HOO!!!

[Jarlaxle]

Never did that on your Econolines?

Though...1992-96 won't. They will go to 399999.9, but from there, they will go back to 300,000. (My friend's father has a 96 E350 that has done so twice.)

One of the wreckers where Liz works just turned 950,000. For the second time. (Yes, it has 1,950,000 miles on it.)

[Econoline]

My last Econoline was a '93; I drove it for 11 years but never even made it to 300,000 let alone 400,000 before I switched to my current Sprinter. I didn't do as much long-distance driving back then as I do now...some of those years I drove only around 16,000 miles. I'll probably get a new van (either another Sprinter, a full-size Ford Transit, or a Ram ProMaster) before this one turns half-a-million.

[Jarlaxle]

Honestly...I would go with either an E350 or a GMC. I have driven a couple of GMC's and have to say the base 2500 drivetrain (4.8 and 6-speed automatic) is REALLY nice. 22MPG highway from a gas-engine 8-lug van is amazing. (That manages better mileage than the base V6/4-speed vans.)

[Lord Jim]

Ford Fiesta 'car for lads' eBay advert with £500,000 bid banned over 'homophobic claim

The rusting 13-year-old car was selling for half a million when the advert was pulled by eBay after a complaint from an anti-homophobia charity

An eBay seller has had his 'homophobic' advert for a Ford Fiesta pulled - just as the bids topped £500,000!

Jamie Rogers, from Chelmsford, Essex, had promised buyers on the auction site a better sex life if they bought the rusting motor.

But the 21-year-old, who described the black Zetec as 'WICKID SICK', angered an anti-homophobia charity with his controversial description - including his use of the word 'f****t'.

Writing about the 13-year-old motor, which has 103,000 miles on the clock, he said: "You can't become a man until you've owned a lads car, so if you don't buy this Zetec S you will always be spotty, your voice will never break properly and you will never beat your addiction to masturbation."

He went on to add: "If you're a parent looking for a car on behalf of your son, this is the car for you.

"If you're 35 years old still living at home and yet to be touched intimately by a woman, then this is not the car for you, f****t."

He also said: "I'm not selling this car to help myself. I'm selling this car to save teenagers across the world from themselves.

"So if you're a teenager looking at making that next big step in your life, this is the car for you.

"Jesus may have been able to walk on water but after buying this car you'll be able to swim on land.

"You'll be able to squeeze orange juice from bananas and you WILL be able to touch MC Hammer. Why? Because that's the kind of thing real men do."

And whilst more than 70 people went on to bid for the car, topping the £500,000 mark with six days still left in the auction, the sellers' description angered representatives from Galop, a leading anti-LGBT hate crime charity.

Their interim chief executive, Dr Marianna Tortell told The Metro: "The perpetuation of homophobic and misogynist stereotypes and statements such as in the eBay ad serve to reinforce the context in which hate crime against LGBT people takes place.

"Galop actively works against hate crime and would therefore encourage Ebay to remove the offensive ad."

Responding to the complaint, a spokesman for eBay said: ‘We don’t allow listings with offensive language, and we are removing this listing immediately."

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/ja ... ay-2901060

[Gob]

That's odd, faggot is an American term, I've not known Brits use it.

[oldr_n_wsr]

I thought in the UK "faggot" meant cigarettes.

[Gob]

"fag" means cigarette, a faggot is these;

Prep Time: 20 minutes
Cook Time: 1 hour
Total Time: 1 hour, 20 minutes
Ingredients:

4 oz/110g pork shoulder, roughly chopped
4 oz/ 110g pig's liver, roughly chopped
8 oz/250g fatty belly pork, roughly choppped
4 oz/110g bacon scraps
4 oz/ 110g bread crumbs
1 medium onion, finely chopped
1/2 tsp mace
1 tsp allspice
2 tbsp chopped parsley
2 sage leaves, finely chopped
1 small red chili, deseeded and finely chopped
Salt and Pepper
Caul fat*** or streaky bacon

Preparation:
Serves 4
Preheat the oven to 445°F/170°C/Gas 3

Mince all the roughly chopped meats, if you don't have a mincer, then chop in a food processor.
Place the minced meat into a large bowl. Add the breadcrumbs, onion, herbs, spices and a pinch of salt and pepper. Mix thoroughly.
Divide the mixture into 8 and shape into balls.
Wrap each ball in caul or streaky bacon. Make sure the caul or bacon overlaps as it will seal as it cooks and hold the faggots together.
Place the faggots onto a baking sheet and bake in the hot oven for 50 - 60 minutes.

What to Serve with Faggots
Traditionally, faggots would be served, hot from the oven with creamy, mashed potatoes, and peas, preferably mushy peas and lashings of rich, thick onion gravy.

***Caul is the membrane which holds in animal organs and it makes a good container for the faggots. If you can't get caul, then use strips of streaky bacon.

[oldr_n_wsr]

I stand corrected.
Does sound yummy (and I would do the wrapped in bacon. I love bacon)

[Sean]

Mmmmm... Black Country faggots 'n' peas...

[MajGenl.Meade]

I remember mum used to say "I want you to eat every faggot and pea on your plate". Well, it sounded wrong but I did it anyway.

[oldr_n_wsr]

How can you have any pudding unless you eat your meat.