An Early April Fools Story

Cars, Bikes, Airplanes, "bicycles" spelled correctly, Tools and Toys.
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dales
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An Early April Fools Story

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Tesla Announces Plans For Workers To Build Cars At Home Due To Coronavirus Concerns



Not to be outdone by the Big Three that announced comprehensive work-from-home plans for their employees, Tesla announced today a similar set of plans, but also ones that went much further, permitting workers to build Tesla cars in their own homes. The idea was said to have come directly from Elon Musk, according to Musk’s personal secretary Cassandra Clearlyfakeperson.

Tesla PR representative Eugene McNotreal provided Jalopnik with a copy of the instructions given to employees, which is both entirely fictional and contains some highly progressive mandates for keeping operations going during the COVID-19 threat:

“Employees that have large-scale metal stamping presses at their homes will be asked to take home several rolls of sheet aluminum so that they may stamp hoods and doors,”
“Workers with backyard forges may be asked to order steel ingots from suppliers to cast into suspension arms and motor mounting assemblies,”

The document goes on to provide download links to CAD files and other engineering documentation. Virtual rooms in the online messaging system Slack have been established for employees to co-ordinate assembly work, and provide a way for employees to coordinate sending partially-completed cars to other employees homes to continue work.
Tesla has a special email address set up so when a worker finishes a car, they can request the car be picked up from their home and taken to other employee’s homes for quality control and testing.

Your collective inability to acknowledge this obvious truth makes you all look like fools.


yrs,
rubato

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Gob
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Re: An Early April Fools Story

Post by Gob »

:lol: :lol: :lol:
“If you trust in yourself, and believe in your dreams, and follow your star. . . you'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren't so lazy.”

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