Give me this day, my daily mash...

[Gob]

ALMOST one thousand Anglicans are to mark Easter by making a slight adaptation to their voodoo.

As part of some ridiculous protest 900 members of the Church of England are shifting their delusion into the Roman Catholic column.

The move was celebrated by the Pope who wore his special Pointy Welcome Hat and banged his ceremonial tambourine.

A Vatican spokesman said: "These brave souls can look forward to nicer seats in heaven rather than some rubbish at the back with a pillar in the way.

"They will be so close to the stage they will be able to reach out and touch Jesus's sequined trouser leg during What's New Pussycat."

Julian Cook, a former Anglican who would rather not have vaginas on his priests thank you very much, said: "As well as being preached to exclusively by frustrated, sexually dangerous men, I can also look forward to a much beefier communion experience.

"The Church of England says the wine and bread only symbolises the blood and body of Christ, whereas my new church has assured me that I am actually eating juicy bits of Jesus.

"It sounds absolutely delicious."

Helen Archer, a former Church of England member who thinks she is unqualified to tell fairy stories, added: "I've always found Anglican guilt to be rather lacking in 'oomph'.

"From today I can watch a Dolph Lundgren film with my pants off and then go upstairs and burn myself with a curling iron.

"Hurt me, Jesus. Hurt me like a bitch."

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/soci ... 104213745/

[Lord Jim]

by Excatajal » Thu May 19, 2011 8:54 pm
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I am studying to reside close to the lives of my friends without ever seeing them. No miles of any measurement can separate your soul from mine.
Although Britain came perilously close to becoming a member of the Civil Conflict on the side of the South, or a minimum of offering explicit support. (Britain produced textiles and the American South grew cotton.) Which would have had some interesting consequences for world history.
That explains why she isn't as near Chrono as to the rest of her friends. She never blew him up! Het Option Yuuno is round, but has less and fewer presence every season.
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The household called Falcon?s Nest Chimney Sweeps for help in releasing Frank. Just a few days earlier than, owner Earl Bunch, had checked a gap close to the house for the canine, using particular cameras he uses to examine train certain chimneys. Mr. Bunch mentioned he often gets known as to rescue wild animals from chimneys and pets from trees, however this was the primary canine he ever rescued. He and Ms. Hallene?s sons cleared away the comb and debris until Frank was freed. Despite being trapped for more than a week Frank did not look any worse for the wear.

Well, Strop should be happy...

He finally got a response to this thread....

[The Hen]

Yeah, but now the spammmer has been deleted the response in this thread is from you and me.

Do accidental responses count as a response?