"Wife texts husband on a cold winter morning: “Windows frozen, won’t open.”
Husband texts back: “Gently pour lukewarm water over it.”
Wife texts back 5 minutes later: “Computer really screwed up now.”
Joke
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MajGenl.Meade
- Posts: 21183
- Joined: Sun Apr 25, 2010 8:51 am
- Location: Groot Brakrivier
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Re: Joke
For Christianity, by identifying truth with faith, must teach-and, properly understood, does teach-that any interference with the truth is immoral. A Christian with faith has nothing to fear from the facts
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oldr_n_wsr
- Posts: 10838
- Joined: Sun Apr 18, 2010 1:59 am
Re: Joke
How many people counted the names to be sure there were 8 characters?
yes I did
yes I did
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Beer Sponge
- Posts: 715
- Joined: Sat Apr 17, 2010 5:31 pm
Re: Joke
Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Yuma, Arizona. They turn a corner and see a sign that says, "Old Timers Bar - ALL drinks 10 cents." They look at each other and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true.
The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, "Come on in and let me pour one for you! What'll it be, gentlemen?"
There's a fully stocked bar, so each of the men orders a martini. In no time the bartender serves up four iced martinis - shaken, not stirred - and says, "That'll be 10 cents each, please."
The four guys stare at the bartender for a moment, then at each other. They can't believe their good luck. They pay the 40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round. Again, four excellent martinis are produced, with the bartender again saying, "That's 40 cents, please." They pay the 40 cents, but their curiosity gets the better of them. They've each had two martinis and haven't even spent a dollar yet.
Finally one of them says, "How can you afford to serve martinis as good as these for a dime apiece?"
"I'm a retired tailor from Phoenix ," the bartender says, "and I always wanted to own a bar. Last year I hit the Lottery jackpot for $125 million and decided to open this place. Every drink costs a dime. Wine, liquor, beer - it's all the same."
"Wow! That's some story!" one of the men says.
As the four of them sip at their martinis, they can't help noticing seven other people at the end of the bar who don't have any drinks in front of them and haven't ordered anything the whole time they've been there.
Nodding at the seven at the end of the bar, one of the men asks the bartender, "What's with them?"
The bartender says, "They're retired people from Canada. They're waiting for Happy Hour when drinks are half-price."
The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, "Come on in and let me pour one for you! What'll it be, gentlemen?"
There's a fully stocked bar, so each of the men orders a martini. In no time the bartender serves up four iced martinis - shaken, not stirred - and says, "That'll be 10 cents each, please."
The four guys stare at the bartender for a moment, then at each other. They can't believe their good luck. They pay the 40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round. Again, four excellent martinis are produced, with the bartender again saying, "That's 40 cents, please." They pay the 40 cents, but their curiosity gets the better of them. They've each had two martinis and haven't even spent a dollar yet.
Finally one of them says, "How can you afford to serve martinis as good as these for a dime apiece?"
"I'm a retired tailor from Phoenix ," the bartender says, "and I always wanted to own a bar. Last year I hit the Lottery jackpot for $125 million and decided to open this place. Every drink costs a dime. Wine, liquor, beer - it's all the same."
"Wow! That's some story!" one of the men says.
As the four of them sip at their martinis, they can't help noticing seven other people at the end of the bar who don't have any drinks in front of them and haven't ordered anything the whole time they've been there.
Nodding at the seven at the end of the bar, one of the men asks the bartender, "What's with them?"
The bartender says, "They're retired people from Canada. They're waiting for Happy Hour when drinks are half-price."
Personally, I don’t believe in bros before hoes, or hoes before bros. There needs to be a balance. A homie-hoe-stasis, if you will.