Things you are unlikely to ever do again?

[Guinevere]

Ha and to you both (but you're right)!

What a depressing interview last night. The Swede likened it to watching OJ's Bronco swerve all over the freeway. I think it was even more more horrific than that.

[oldr_n_wsr]

At least OJ was eventually aquited.

[Lord Jim]

"Dial" a telephone...

change a television channel by turning a dial on the set....

manually adjust the color, "vertical hold", (remember what a pain that used to be? When the screen image would keep flipping? Another example of better living through technology...) or "fine tuning" on a TV set....

drop acid or snort coke....

drop acid and then play tennis at 4 in the morning...

have sex with a 15 year old....(I was 14 at the time...)

have an all night sex session with three women at the same time....(I'll never forget that night in Angeles City...)

Vote for Ronald Reagan...( )

watch the Redskins win a Super bowl....

Jump on a plane last minute to take a little mini-vacation just because I felt like it, without having to consult anyone else....

[TPFKA@W]

have an all night sex session with three women at the same time....(I'll never forget that night in Angeles City...)

If anyone else had written this you would be the first prude on the wagon screeching , "TMI TMI".

[Gob]

have an all night sex session with three women at the same time....(I'll never forget that night in Angeles City...)

That was just the acid Jim, it didn't happen....

[Joe Guy]

Edited to delete an unfinished post.

[Lord Jim]

"TMI TMI".

Well just for that, I'm going to give you a little more information...

(Not about the proceedings themselves, but about how it happened....I believe I related this story back at the CSB, but I'm happy to tell it again)

Actually this did not happen in Angeles City, it happened in Manila....(Once we got to Clark I hooked up with one lady that I spent my time with...I got so wrapped up with her that I was very seriously considering bringing her back to the US and marrying her; but that's another story....)

Back in 1986, I worked for a time as a court reporter for a firm that had a number of government contracts. One of the outfits we worked for was the Armed Services Board Of Contract Appeals. This was a Defense Department outfit that was responsible for adjudicating complaints by local contractors against US military bases....

Well, I was given a three month assignment in the Philippines to provide our services for a series of hearings at the Air Base at Clark, and the naval base at Subic Bay....

So I flew over with the judge, (an older guy, who I established a very good rapport with) from DC to Manila....

They put us up in The Manila Hotel when we first arrived, which is probably the best hotel in the city....(Marble bath tubs, with brass fixtures...and if you wanted room service you didn't call down to the lobby...there was a guy assigned to your room on the floor who's job it was to respond to you and just one other room to get you whatever you wanted...it was really quite palatial... )

The night we arrived a typhoon hit Manila, so I was stuck in the hotel and a decision was made that it would be another day before we would fly up to Clark....

The next day the storm had passed, and by that night, I was getting a really bad case of cabin fever...

So I walked out of the hotel, got in a cab, and asked the driver to take me to some place where there was night life going on.....

He took me to a bar, (that I soon recognized as a strip joint; having seen one or two of them previously) but because of the storm, there were only two other customers in the place....

So I sat down and ordered a drink, and it wasn't long before a very cute, lively young lady joined me at my table...

And then a second...

And then a third...

So, I'm buying them drinks, (yes, theirs were more expensive than mine, but my drinks were only 50 cents, and theirs were a buck fifty, so a round for the four of us only came to $6.50...I was told to be prepared for things being a lot cheaper in the Philippines than in The States, but I was unprepared for just how much cheaper...more on that in a moment...)

Well, I was enjoying their company, but it was getting on to about 1 AM so I decided I should head back to the hotel....

At this point the owner of the establishment, (who I assume was also their, uh, booking agent...) came over and asked, "would you like to take one of these ladies back to the hotel with you for the night?"....

Well that kind of took me aback...even though I'd had a few drinks, I'm thinking: that's a really classy hotel, I probably shouldn't be taking a hooker there, (I was 26 at the time, and kind of naive about the relationship between hotels and hookers) the judge is staying on the same floor as my room, and on top of that it was a point of personal pride that I had never paid for sex....(never had to; hadn't before and since leaving the Philippines, never did so again....)

So I tried to beg off in a classy way and said, "You know, they're all so lovely I don't think I could choose between them"

At which point the proprietor smiles and says, "then why don't you take all three?"...

Well that really put me aback....

But merely as a point of intellectual curiosity, (and remembering how cheap the drinks were) I decide to ask, "well, what would that cost?"

And the number he gave me was the equivalent in US dollars to sixty bucks....

That was rather shocking...

But nevertheless, I'm still trying to pussy out...

And I said, "no, uh, I really don't think I could do that..."

Which he interpreted as my saying that the price was too high, so he started dropping it.....

I kept trying to beg off, he kept dropping the price....(I guess because the storm had made business slow...)

Finally he came down to what amounted to $47.50.....

At this point, I had the little cartoon angel on one shoulder, devil on the other, thing going on....

Angel: "Jim, you can't do this! You can't bring three hookers back to your room at a four star hotel! What if the judge or the air force major they sent to collect you and fly you up to Clark found out? How embarrassing would that be? On top of that, you don't pay for sex."

Devil: Fuck that. The judge and the major aren't your parents, you're a grown man in a foreign country, what you do on your own time is your own business. When are you going to get another shot like this? You've spent more than that on a woman and not gotten more than a good night kiss...Three beautiful, lively women for a whole night of sex, for less than fifty bucks and you're going to pass that up? What, are you nuts? Stop being a fucking pussy and go for it dude!"


Well, the devil won out....

So we piled into a cab and headed back for the hotel....

Despite having committed to this course of action, I'm still having Clark Griswold type, "this is crazy, this is crazy" thoughts...

I decide that it would probably be okay to bring one woman up through the main lobby....but three?

So after we get out of the cab, I explain to the girls that I don't want to bring them all in at the same time....(which they found amusing...)

So I took one in to bring up, instructing the other two to wait....

Then after I had the first one discreetly ensconced in my room, I go back downstairs, and after reconnoitering the outside hotel, bring the second one up through an entrance near the pool....(The hotel had a security guy at that entrance, but as I was a guest of the hotel, this was not a problem)

I then waited a little while, and brought the third one in through the front....

(Now, passing over the TMI bit)

The next morning, I brought the three ladies down to the hotel restaurant for breakfast....

Where I encountered the major and the judge....

I made up a ridiculous story, about how one of the girls was the daughter of a friend of my father's and that the other two were friends of hers... (it had a grain of truth to it; my father was good friends with one of the leading Phillipino journalists of the time, and later I did spend time with him and his family)

They didn't say so, but I could tell from the smirks on their faces that they didn't believe me....

[Gob]

I hope you tipped generously Jim?

[Lord Jim]

I hope you tipped generously Jim?

I gave them each another twenty for themselves...(Which was quite generous by Philippine standards at the time...)

[Gob]

That's good.

[dales]

Post ANYTHING at Snitty's Shathaus.

[Gob]

AU $624 Dep 31 May 13 - Rtn 03 Sep 13 Sydney to Manila

[TPFKA@W]

Well Jim you have moved me to confess my personal fantasy:



Two men at once....

















One cooking and one cleaning.

[oldr_n_wsr]

I had never paid for sex....(never had to; hadn't before and since leaving the Philippines, never did so again....)

Oh yes you/we do. You/We certainly do. Maybe not directly, but you/we do.

[Andrew D]

Punctuate anything with an interrobang -- ‽