Ozzy Osbourne is a giant of hard rock and metal but not one of nature's most articulate men.
His most famous utterance until now has been a whiny "Sharon" directed at his longstanding, long-suffering and long profitable wife. Even then, as loveable as he may appear, you wouldn't be putting money on the shambling lead singer of Black Sabbath being absolutely sure how to spell that name.
After almost 34 years, Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne have reportedly "temporarily" split, but it's not the first time their marriage has been under speculation.
However, Osbourne may have given us a phrase that come year's end will surely figure as one of the defining terms of 2016. A phrase that could become a standard defence when certain men - hell, men or women – find themselves in a tricky ménage-a-god knows how many.
Faced with publicly admitting to having an affair with his former hair stylist (Yes, his former hair stylist. What? You thought that mane looked after itself?) that caused he and Sharon to separate, Osbourne did the honourable thing and blamed it on a "sex addiction". He said he is undergoing "intense therapy" for the condition.
So far, so standard, even if you believe "sex addiction" would have been known as good old-fashioned randiness in Birmingham where he grew up, just now with added accessibility thanks to fame and "intense therapy" is a few rounds of Mrs O pounding the bejeezus out of him with a cable TV show contract.
But Ozzy was not finished and we don't mean with the "other women he has been having sexual relationships with", as they were described in a statement from his lawyers/advisers/spiritualists/but presumably not hair stylists.
Addressing said former hair stylist, Michelle Pugh, he said in his statement he was "sorry if Ms Pugh took their sexual relationship out of context".
Wait. What? Out of context? What does that mean?
Does it refer to an employer/employee context? An "I'll call you in the morning" context? A work/life balance context? A "my lawyer is mouthing words at me and it's hurting my head, please make him stop, S..h...a...r..o..n" context?
We need to know, but maybe we won't until the next celebrity standing at the gates of his mansion with grim-faced spouse next to him, cameras in their faces, utters the words "I am sorry [insert name of unfortunate third person in this marriage] took our sexual relationship out of context".
The Ozzy defence. You read it here.
The Ozzy excuse.
The Ozzy excuse.
“If you trust in yourself, and believe in your dreams, and follow your star. . . you'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren't so lazy.”