Now maybe we can keep the nastiness out of oldr's...
loCAtek wrote:Actually, I did say to Oldr, to be careful what you say to some people, through no fault of their own, they really don't know what you're going through and expect it to be over soon "If you'd just..." Interestingly, I noted a lot of similarities between alcoholism and PTSD; troops returning from the desert and their families are counseled 'not to expect someone to quickly return to normal.", you have to be patient. With alcoholism and PTSD - "Everyone's recovery is different" ...and relapse restart can and will happen at just about anytime. The most common mistake friends and family will make is to get frustrated and demand, "When are you going to get over it?" or "How long are you gonna be like this!?" or "I thought you were over this by now!?" or "You're just not trying, are you?"
In spite of the fact, that from the first, I repeatedly, politely asked Hen, and I quote, "Don't try to fix me, you'll only get frustrated" unquote. That she chose not to listen to that, is not due to my not trying with what I knew of my and others past experiences. Therefore, I accepted her and BSG's requests not to discuss issues with them last year, and I went on to other options over eight months ago. BSG and I remain friends, while once a month or so, Hen continues to try and tell me how I should fix myself. We could still be friends and she wouldn't be frustrated, if she would just listen to what I said in the first place.
On a good note, the only issue, I have right now is the drinking. Work is going well; finances are stabilizing; the BF and I are doing better than ever; I may have the time and money this year for a vacation and I have bunnies again [yay!] As an added extra bonus, owlito season is approaching!
Alpha Dog will possibly, maybe , could be back from the ME in the summer, and I noticed last R & R, he's started drinking Coronas ...and he's never liked beer much before except for social occasions. He's been very accepting of my alcoholism- even ribbing me with the nic 'Wineho' LOL I hope to be there for his PTSD, when he returns.
You can even have the thread title changed if you like!
