TOMORROW; cool and windy, chance of total apocalypse.

[Crackpot]

Did you look at that guys "math" and "proofs" the phrase "pulling numbers out of his ass" would be kind.

As for playing jokes thhe Bible clearly says no one can know when the end will come (aparently Jesus wasn't even privy to that knowledge) Is it's gods Fault we don't listen?

[Gob]

Bet these poor sods thought the rapture had hit them!!

A thunderstorm is hindering search and rescue efforts in a US city hit by a devastating tornado on Sunday.

The tornado tore through Joplin in the state of Missouri, killing at least 116 people and injuring 1,000. Seven people have been rescued from the rubble.

Joplin official Mark Rohr said the storm cut a path six miles (10km) long, flattening buildings and damaging a hospital that had to be evacuated.

Strong winds and hail have hit the city, much of which is without power.

The tornado knocked down power lines and telephone services remain largely cut off.

Joplin fire chief Mitch Randles said approximately one quarter or more of the city, home to about 50,000 people, had been damaged.

Roughly 2,000 buildings were damaged in the region, according to Jasper County emergency management director Keith Stammer.

More than 1,150 people have been treated for injuries stemming from the tornado, The Joplin Globe newspaper reported.


http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-13509683

[Crackpot]

Jackass is holding to the Oct 21st date and generally showing himself to be an unrepentant bastard.

[Scooter]

He got what he wanted out of it:

In 2009, the non-profit Family Radio reported in IRS filings that it received $18.3 million in donations, and had assets of more than $104 million, including $34 million in stocks or other publicly traded securities.

[Crackpot]

You know I think the guy is delusional enough to believe what he's saying yet that doesn't change the fact that he's addicted to his own perceived cleverness and has convinced himself that he's a prophet.

[Timster]

For they have sown the wind, and they shall reap the whirlwind: it hath no stalk; the bud shall yield no meal: if so be it yield, the strangers shall swallow it up.Hosea 8:7

. . .

[Gob]

The world is grey, the mountains old,
The forges fire is ashen-cold’
No harp is wrung, no hammer falls:
The darkness dwells in Durins halls’
The shadow lies upon his tomb
In Moria, in Khazad-dûm.
But still the sunken stars appear
In dark and windless Mirrormere;
There lies his crown in water deep,
Till Durin wakes again from his sleep.

Lord of the Rings

[Timster]

Perfect~

[Grim Reaper]

Turns out the rapture has been postponed - October 21st is the new date for armageddon.

[Crackpot]

Not new. that was the original date just no rapture.

[dales]

I'll take "rupture" for a thousand, Alex.

[Gob]

THE End of Days has brought death, demons and pestilence to the planet, leaving many mid-sized UK towns the same or slightly better..


Welcome to RuncornAs predicted by an insane old man, the Rapture descended shortly after Doctor Who on Saturday.

Britain's dozen or so Christians were transported to a lovely garden on a cloud with soft beanbags, friendly wildlife and Enigma playing at ambient volume, while the country's remaining humans began an eternity of torment.

However the resulting lakes of fire, jet-black skies and plagues of demonic entities have gone largely unnoticed in the hundreds of already depressing towns spread around the UK.

Tom Logan, from Bridgwater, said: "There's a stench of sulphur, an atmosphere of terrifying hopelessness and someone or something just tried to bite my face off.

"All present and correct for a Saturday night in Bridgey. I noticed a bit more fire than usual but I find flames quite soothing."

Nikki Ellis, of Derby, said: "I saw a group of lost souls in tattered clothing, gibbering and frothing at their mouths. But that was on Friday and it was the queue outside Cash Converters."

Mother-to-two Emma Bradford lives in Penzance, where a horde of creatures straight out of the painting Garden of Earthly Delights is on a bloody rampage.

She said: "They're scaly and bulbous-headed and they soil the streets with their demon fire-piss.

"And then they have a kebab."

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/soci ... 105233849/

[Sean]

[The Hen]

Ha!