The recession has hit everybody in the US really hard…............
 
 Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can’t afford batteries.
 
 CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.
 
 Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
 
 A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of  pennies while she danced.
 
 I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
 
 If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call  them and ask if they meant you or them.
 
 Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
 
 Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.
 
 A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
 
 A picture is now only worth 200 words.
 
 When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
 
 The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
 
 And, finally….
 
 I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs,  my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the  Suicide Hotline. 
I got a call centre in Pakistan, and when I told them  I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a  truck.
			
			
									
									THE US RECESSION
THE US RECESSION
“If you trust in yourself, and believe in your dreams, and follow your star. . . you'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren't so lazy.” 
						