Executive Vacuities

[dgs49]

On Friday, I was compelled to go through a PPT training session on "Sustainability."

Basically, we ought to run our company and our lives in a manner that ensures that later generations will be able to do the same. Turn out the lights, don't drink bottled water, don't print a hard copy when an electronic copy would be satisfactory. Stuff like that.

Then, one of the last slides on the presentation is a greeting from our newly-hired "Vice President of Sustainability." A woman, of course. I wonder what "qualifications" got her that job.

I suppose she will sit near our "Vice President of Diversity." Another woman. Of course.

My previous employer hired a Vice President of Quality - a newly created position - while I was there. A woman, of course. Her job was to take all of the policies and procedures from her previous employer, and get people like me to rewrite them so that they made sense in this company. She left us after a few years to take a similar position with a larger company. Oddly, they found no reason to replace her. Also, I learned that she had no background in stastics or sampling, or anything that one normally associates with, you know. QUALITY. But that was not an obstacle to her hiring at a six-figure salary and with a corner office.

I feel sorry for the people who work hard in these organizations, do their best to produce meaningful results, educate themselves about the company and its products and services. Then they see the company making space and spending good money on these total bullshit executive positions, and pretending like they are vitally important to something or other.

I'm glad I'm too old to give a shit, but it is still aggravating.

[Big RR]

Personally, I think most companies "invent" positions like that because that's what Wall Street expects. Every company must toe the line to Wall Street expectations when nothing but short term profits matter, and embracing the latest "flavor of the month", from TQM to 6-sigma to sustainablility is a requirement. And so they hire senior executives and consultants to prove they've embraced the "proper" corporate mindset and keep the stock price up. But when short term profits are all that matters it's no pretense, this BS is "vitally important".

[Big RR]

By the way, every one of those corporate "changes" were marketed as revolutionary and reflectiveof a "paradigm shift/sea change"; and like the peasants in the fable, all the corproate leaders fall in line, proclaiming them as such and pretending they can't see the emperor has no clothes.

[Gob]

The BBC has a "compliance" department, which serves to ensure that "all programmes comply with the relevant statutory and regulatory provisions."

What it really means is that a bunch of "ultra lefty, save the gay, disabled, single-parent, vegetarian, black, whale'" types suck any joy or controversy out of any new ideas.

[Econoline]

I get the impression that dgs wouldn't mind these "total bullshit executive positions" nearly so much if they were occupied by men rather than women. Just sayin'.

[Scooter]

If he were the man hired for the job, he would be raving about how important it was to the wellbeing of the company, and how he was singlehandedly saving the whole shooting match from bankruptcy.

[Guinevere]

Ding ding ding: Scooter and Econoline are right on.

[The Hen]

Did you apply for these positions dgs?

I am so sorry you were beaten by a woman. It must be so frustrating to not have ovaries.

I know I only got as far as I have due to them.

[dgs49]

These positions - all three of them - were created out of thin air, and were not advertised. They were simply filled. I personally believe that bullshit positions like this ought to be filled by tokens in all cases, to remove any doubt that it is nothing but nonsense. When I was with the Feds we had an EEO/Compliance Officer who was a white man, and I was appalled, as most of you would be. Admit it.

As for "compliance," my take on those positions is a little bit different. In today's regulatory framework it is smart to have someone who is legally and administratively competent whose full-time obligation is to monitor existing and new regs, and ensure that everyone in the organization has the resources to comply (and see that the company doesn't get into trouble).

But of course some "compliance" positions are filled by tokens, which is stupid, inappropriate, and unnecessary.

[dales]

At your age, be glad you're employed.

[The Hen]

When I was with the Feds we had an EEO/Compliance Officer who was a white man, and I was appalled, as most of you would be. Admit it.

For the life of me I cannot work out why you would be appalled at that.

It is attitudes like yours that make these positions necessary. As soon as you get over being appalled about something so straightforward, the sooner we might get away from needing to create these positions in the first place.

Now go on a suitable diversity course and learn something for a change.

[Sue U]

It is attitudes like yours that make these positions necessary. As soon as you get over being appalled about something so straightforward, the sooner we might get away from needing to create these positions in the first place.

Now go on a suitable diversity course and learn something for a change.

Oh, it's a lovely thought, Hen, but dgs49 has proudly proclaimed he is impervious to education.

[Guinevere]

Adding my golf clap.

Dave, we counsel and represent employers all the time. Those with a good EEO/compliance officer end up in far less litigation than those who don't.

[rubato]

On Friday, I was compelled to go through a PPT training session on "Sustainability."

Basically, we ought to run our company and our lives in a manner that ensures that later generations will be able to do the same. Turn out the lights, don't drink bottled water, don't print a hard copy when an electronic copy would be satisfactory. Stuff like that.

Then, one of the last slides on the presentation is a greeting from our newly-hired "Vice President of Sustainability." A woman, of course. I wonder what "qualifications" got her that job.

I suppose she will sit near our "Vice President of Diversity." Another woman. Of course.

My previous employer hired a Vice President of Quality - a newly created position - while I was there. A woman, of course. Her job was to take all of the policies and procedures from her previous employer, and get people like me to rewrite them so that they made sense in this company. She left us after a few years to take a similar position with a larger company. Oddly, they found no reason to replace her. Also, I learned that she had no background in stastics or sampling, or anything that one normally associates with, you know. QUALITY. But that was not an obstacle to her hiring at a six-figure salary and with a corner office.

I feel sorry for the people who work hard in these organizations, do their best to produce meaningful results, educate themselves about the company and its products and services. Then they see the company making space and spending good money on these total bullshit executive positions, and pretending like they are vitally important to something or other.

I'm glad I'm too old to give a shit, but it is still aggravating.

So you are saying that the company who hired you typically hires useless or unqualified people?


And this reflects on ....


yrs,
rubato

[dgs49]

(a) At my age, I am VERY thankful of being employed.

(b) My company is in a very strong position in the labor market locally, and we can pick and choose among hundreds of people who apply for every position we advertise. But despite that advantage it is incredible to me how many "slugs" we end up with. Most new hires are outstanding, but still some of them make you scratch your head in wonder.

(c) I was one of more than a hundred people who applied for this position (actually, three were advertised, but the other two were cancelled due to sales not meeting projections). My credentials are off the charts, and that's no exaggeration. I have extraordinary education and experience, as well as a professional certification that only about 10% of the people in my field have attained. At present, I have next to nothing to do, and what I do is work that any competent high school graduate could do after a little orientation.

(d) In most large, well-managed companies, a good HR person can provide all of the expertise that is required in the area of compliance with employment laws. An occasional phone call to Legal or outside counsel is usually sufficient. It's in the smaller companies where prejudices and discrimination are rampant, but most of them fly under the radar screen of the regulators.

[dgs49]

(e) The people who were hired here to fill the "diversity" and "sustainabilty" positions may be amazingly competent and knowledgeable, for all I know. They are just stupid and unnecessary positions that any moron could fill. It is just irritating to work for a company that claims to be "lean" and efficient, then creates bullshit positions like this.

[dales]

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 7:45 am
(a) At my age, I am VERY thankful of being employed.

From your numerous posts complaining about the company where you work, that's debateble.

[MajGenl.Meade]

Companies hire HR people to make accountants feel useful

[Jarlaxle]

Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2012 7:45 am
(a) At my age, I am VERY thankful of being employed.

From your numerous posts complaining about the company where you work, that's debateble.

I'm thankful I have a job....but until a few months ago, rants about the moron I worked for were not that unusual!

[BoSoxGal]

It is just irritating to work for a company that claims to be "lean" and efficient, then creates bullshit positions like this.

But, by your own admission you barely do anything to earn a paycheck - so shouldn't you be glad that your company is actually fat and inefficient?